A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Can someone please get some sense into me?I went out on a date with this guy and we really hit it off. He's in the airforce and the day after our date he left on a three week assignment. During the three weeks he was away he messaged me every day and called me every two/three days. We talked for hours and I started to think things would turn out well. He came back, we went out again and three days later he told me he's not ready for a relationship. I know that was an excuse and he lost interest for whatever reason but I can't forget him. I know it's is so stupid because all this was was 2 dates and three weeks of long phone conversations.It's been almost three months since this happened, I'm in a relationship with a great guy right now but I still think about the airfoce guy and many times I wish that things with him worked out.I know it's useless to think about him or what could have been but I don't know how to stop. I'm in a fantastic relationship now, my boyfriend treats me really well, cares a lot about me and I basically couldn't ask for more but not a day goes past that I don't dwell on things with the other guy.I hate this and want to forget him but I can't. Please tell me how I can just put him out of my head!I've told myself that the airforce guy thing is a fantasy almost, I've told myself that there's no point in thinking about him since he doesn't want me...none of this works. I know it's stupid and useless but he just won't leave my mind. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2009): Thanks pinktopaz. Your first paragraph makes sense. I mentioned in my post that this airforce guy is almost a fantasy. I didn't get to know him that well and the chances of him being the way I think he is are slim and maybe I wouldn't even have liked him that much if things did work out.Yeah, I do feel guilty at times because my boyfriend is a really good guy. You're right though...I need time.Thanks for the post, it's made me feel better.
A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (9 November 2009):
Do you think that you're still thinking about him maybe because you can't have him? Sometimes when things seem to be going good with someone and you really start to like them; then they back out, it's like a part of you wants to win them over into liking you again when you didn't really like them ALL that much, but you become a little obsessive over it.
If your new boyfriend is everything that's great, then over time the last guy will disappear, it wasn't really that long ago when you were talking to the last guy. You can't force someone out of your mind and I'm sure you feel a little guilty that you think about another guy when you now have such a great boyfriend. It just takes time and you'll have to wait. You can tell yourself lots of things, but you can't help it if he pops into your head.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2009): Best thing to do is to keep your self busy && when you feel your going to think about him again , then call a friend and make plans to do something ! , or you can just stay thinking about him till you completely get tired of him. which will eventually happen.
im not very familiar with a problem like this, but i hope things turn out to be GREAT for you!
hope you can help me out . Please & thank you, bye :]
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