A
female
age
36-40,
*ayhay
writes:I am so confused... and need some help. I have been with the same man for 4 years. (He is 21 I am 20) We were sexually active soon after we got serious, we would fool around a lot, but not much sexual intercourse would happen because I wasn't on birth control. I am now on the nuvaring, and he no longer wants to have sex anymore... I pay a lot of money to be on the ring, and he isn't interested any more. I try to ask him why he doesn't want me... but never gives me a straight answer. I try really hard to hint at him when I am in the mood, and he just turns me down... It has really been stressing me out. He doesn't masturbate either... he could go months without sex and be fine... I don't understand where his sex-drive went... I want the old guy back... does anyone have advise as to how I could get his sex-drive back???
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female
reader, Felina  +, writes (25 November 2008):
 Hi! I think what happen to you is normal. After a while, you just need to spice up a little. If he doesn't even masturbate, he sure needs something to wake him up. Why don't you try this? One evening, when you are both just watching tv, you put a porn DVD to surprise him. Then you just start watching it and the magic will work for its own. Maybe an open conversation about sexual fantasies will also make you good.However, above all, you need to talk to him and understand what he's feelings are about sex. A calm and friendly conversation. You are a couple, so, besides being lovers, you should be the best friends and trust each other. So find out what's worrying him.Good luck.
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