A
female
age
36-40,
*lessken
writes:I am really interested in this guy that I use to work with. He's 9 years my senior and the man that I've always wanted. After knowing each other a year and a half, I have finally told him that I am interested in him and he told he's felt the same way since we first met and never really said anything in fear that I would reject him. He said he would like to take me out sometime and I agreed that would be great, but that was a week ago. So since did not hear from him anymore I sent an email to him apologizing if I had made him feel awkward, then he replied saying I did not make him feel awkward in any way but I just feel so confused. I've always been interested in older men but I've never liked anyone in the way that I like him and I really don't know what to do or say next, could someone help me?
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female
reader, blessken +, writes (10 July 2008):
blessken is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell, I finally got the results. He sent me and email here goes:
"It's very flattering and very much appreciated that you're stepping out of the norm and being aggressive. I LIKE THAT VERY MUCH IN A WOMAN. And I know the feeling that you're talking when we bumped into each other...I told you what I thought when I first saw you! Well...I thought the same thought when I saw you!!
Unfortunately, we have bad timing...I'm dating someone right now.
But we can still talk and hang out from time to time."
It really hurt afterwards because this was my first time letting someone know how I feel. It's okay I know I'll get over it that just lets me know there are still good men out there in the world.
A
female
reader, blessken +, writes (7 July 2008):
blessken is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you to everyone who respond to my question. I think everyone was right and fair in what they said. I asked my brother-in-law about it and he said maybe I should ask him out for lunch or something, but I'm to scared to do that so I'll just wait. It's not that I'm trying to push myself on him, I've never felt this way about anyone before so it's just weird to me. I'm use to the other person liking me and then once we go out then I realize I might actually like this person instead of the other way around.
But again thank you, I'll just wait and see what happens.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2008): Hello there!I am experiencing this exact situation. I have known mine for a year and a half and only recently started to pick up on the subtle hints he has been sending my way (and his family members whom I work for also seem to be sussing out my feelings for him....or at least thats what my gut tells me). Due to the fact that you have told him how you feel, the ball is in his court and now....you wait. (and so perfectly written by rythmandblues2 - If a man is interested, he will pursue you).DO NOT DO anything. Your probably thinking about him non stop, imagining what life would be like with him....etc etc. But the healthiest thing for you to do to help this situation is to do nothing - by nothing of course I mean fill in your time by focusing on yourself. Go out, see your friends, and if you have to talk about it with someone... go ahead talk your head off, analyze every little thing about him...BUT JUST NOT TO HIM! :)If he realizes that your a girl who (regardless of his moves) is happy, and has a life, and basically can keep her emotions together on her own - then he is an idiot if he does not make a move. Let him be the man. Just show him that your are there for him if he needs you, but just dont forget that you have done enough for him to take the next step. DO NOT EMAIL, DO NOT CALL, DO NOT TEXT. Wait for him, and when you hear from him, be happy that he called/emailed etc, and try your hardest not to push him away by bringing up what happened. If he sees that your in total control of yourself, hopefully that will be a nice kick up the a$$ for him to realize that your a great girl, deserving of a great man. Be you, be happy, and be in control. Tell yourself, again and again I will not chase him, don't take away your right to feel like a lady who is pursued by the man she fancies.
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A
female
reader, D.D.B  +, writes (6 July 2008):
maybe you should arrange a lunch or something at a cafe or just invite him round or something and explain to him why you think you are making him feel arquard and then he can tell you if you are or ar`nt and that should get you back on track.
I hope i helped,
D.D.B
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2008): You have done enough, you pursued him, now back off and see if he pursues you....you told him you were interested point blank and he did not run off screaming, and even reiterated your statements....it has only been a week for goodness sake since you told him and he may not want to seem too eager to jump on this....playing a little hard to get keeps the interest up as people always want what they can't have so it seems.
This guy doesn't need any more encouragement from you, in fact you may push him away if you start acting like his girlfriend before the first date...by calling him and emailing him all of the time.....Guys like to chase, so let him do that why don't you.
What do you need to do? Nothing. If a man is interested he will pursue you.
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