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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I have a question. I met this guy when I was 14 and he was 25, just once and he said he liked me then. Obviously,nothing happened then since i was underage. I never saw him again till last year, I'm 24 now and he likes me now too. Obviously the age gap is okay now, but what do you think of him liking me then and now,since i was underage the first time he said he liked me?He wants to go out with me now, he even says he would marry me!Some of my family have known him for a long time,and they all say he is a really kind person,and isnt the sort of person who would mess someone about.He has told all his friends about me,and i heard he didnt really have a proper girlfriend when he was younger.He mentioned that his mum isnt very well,and that all his brothers and sisters are married.I'm not sure if that means anything.He says he thinks i'm a lovely person too and that i'm sensible. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, deejuliet  +, writes (17 November 2008):
 Yes.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2008): hi just wondered if anyone has read this lately ?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2008): I sent him a text last week,the night after we went out,and said i wasnt going out that night,i didnt feel up to going out,and i didnt think he would want to,since he had started work at four in the morning,but i said i would meet him this weekend.He didnt respond,and i sent him a text yesterday asking why he didnt respond last week and asked if he was ok,he said sorry and that he had been working all week,he had been on a shift that started at four in the morning,like last saturday.It was the friday when we went out.I wondered though if he could have been doing the same shift that he did last saturday this week ?.
I asked him what other shifts he does aswell,and that he can just let me know when it's best for him to meet if he likes,but he hasnt responded.It just seems abit strange to me.
I was worried about the talk about marriage and holidays,especially since we havent officially dated yet,and he has also told all his workmates and family about me,which,i dont know whether to be flattered or freaked out by.
I know some people can be obsessed,but not mean any harm,and then there are people who are obsessed but can cause harm.I'm not sure whether he is obsessed or not,but it seems like it.But on the other hand,it doesnt seem like it as he doesnt always respond to me when i contact him.Maybe thats just a guy thing though,or that he's busy.
As for him getting jealous of the other guy who was chatting me up aswell,i dont know what to think of that either.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2008): Sounds like he fell in love with you, couldn't have you, and now he's met you again he wants to keep you forever.... He's done exactly what I always recommend. Don't go out with underage children, wait until they grow up. Well you've grown up now babes, and he still likes you a hell of a lot. Get him to stop with the marriage and holiday talk, tell him you both need to take things slowly, learn to be friends, and who knows what might happen in the future. Good luck, he sounds like one of the good guys.....
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A
female
reader, deejuliet +, writes (4 November 2008):
I am not concerned that he liked you when you were 14 and that he also likes you now. That he didnt pursue you when you were 14 shows he had a sence of decency and knew it was wrong at that time. Now that you are older it is fine! What does concern me though it that he is already talking marriage and showing jelousy so much. Talking marriage, taking holidays together and making such long term life plans at such an early stage in the game sends up some red flags to me. I do hope he is a nice guy. Please keep us posted!
~dee
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2008): I went out with him tonight.After a while,he put his arm round me and was rubbing my arm,lol,but he hasnt kissed me yet.I'm not sure if thats bad,or if he's shy.We were in a nightclub at the time,and i was shy about kissing him to be honest.He just gave me a quick kiss on the lips when i got out of the taxi we shared to go home.
I dont like rushing into things anyway,and as i said ,before,i wasnt sure if he was genuine or not.I always feel uncomfortable kissing a new person,i havent been out with many people as it is.How can you make yourself feel more confident about that ?.
I actually think it's quite a funny coincidence that we met when i was a teenager and then again after all these years.Perhaps it's fate !.
He wants me to go out with him again tonight,he's keen !,but i will see about that.I might go next week instead or something.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2008): Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Why not give it a try?
He sure sounds interesting and genuine.
"Take a chance! All life is a chance. THe man who goes the furthest is generally the one who is willing to do and dare". (quote by Dale Carnegie).
Keep us updated.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2008): Anyone have any more thoughts ?.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2008): I was worried about a couple of things.One is that when he originally liked me,i was only 14,and i'm not sure if thats bad or not,and also,i'm not sure if it's strange or not that he says he would marry me,since we havent been out with each other yet.We've only met up afew times,but havent officially dated yet.He said this the first time he saw me last year,when we met up again,and has said it since.
I met up with him last week,and he got really jealous of this guy who was chatting me up.I could see he looked hurt,and he got angry at this guy and told him to leave me alone.
And,i also wondered if it is possible to like someone at one time,and like them again so long after,when you havent seen them for such a long time too.
If he is genuine and a nice guy,then yes,i would like to give him a chance.I just want to make sure first.He has even said things like he'd like to go on holidays with me aswell.
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A
female
reader, deejuliet +, writes (30 October 2008):
Go for it! Why not give it a shot now? As you have stated the age differance is not so important anymore as you are an adult. I had something very similar happen to me. When I was 13 I met a young man who was 20. We both liked each other very much but at that time the age differance was too great and we couldnt date. Now, 25 years later I got divorced and he and I started dating! We have been together now for about 3 years! You will never know until you try.
Good luck,
dee
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