A
female
age
30-35,
*pendy
writes: What is going on here? HELPPPP?We’ve been together for 3 months.. after 2 months he changed and started been all weird and not calling me much.. he use to call me everyday..last time i saw him he got really angry and accused me of cheating on him... and I told him That hes the only one for me.. he said am lying.. i asked him if he says any proof that am cheating he didn’t say anything just said he knows and i know that am cheat.. but am not cheating on him I like him.. I started falling for him.. he says am playing games with him he doesn’t care about me anymore.. and always starts arguments... I TOLD HIM THAT IS HIM THAT I WANT and that am not cheating on him.. We made up.. i asked him if he still likes me.. if he's still interested in me like we 1st met.. he said yes.. and he told me to call him we reach home.. i called but he didn’t answer so I text him and its been a 4 WEEKS now he hasn’t called or texted me.. Not even on NEW YEARS.. And I haven’t contacted him either...What is going on? WHAT SHOULD I DO NOW? Please help me..x
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, 48years +, writes (23 January 2009):
Oh, Honey...you've been dumped. Oh shit...it hurts like hell. He's gone.
Grieve a little in private or with a best gf, do not pig out too much, make sure you look fantastic when you go out, do NOT call or text him, otherwise you'll just have to rinse and repeat. Do not arrange an "accidental" meeting, cause you might accidently see him with Ms. New-thing. Do not in any way embarrass yourself - you're way too classy for that, and word does get around.
Hardest of all; Try to forget him. If you have to remember every conversation, every detail, then do it. Write it all down - it's our way of healing. Take comfort from the fact that every person that has ever walked the earth has at one time or another, felt that crazy obsessive hamster running in their head over a rejection... it's ok.
You will live and love someone who loves you back.
PS: Break up sex seemed like a good idea at the time, right? I'll bet you wish you hadn't done it, now. Don't beat yourself up about it . ...but don't let him get the best of you again.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2009): Okay. He accuses you of cheating, and when you explained to him that you have not done that, he called you a liar. I wonder, on what did he base his accusation?
I'm afraid that from what you tell us, it sounds very much as if he suddenly decided he no longer wanted to be in relationship with you. Why? frankly, that's anyone's guess. Certainly HE won't tell you the reason.
His behavior of starting to act weird, and telling you to call him when you got home, but then ignoring you for four weeks, is pretty typical of the dirty tricks some guys will resort to when they just want out. He saw that you were protesting your innocence and he told you yes, he still wanted to be with you but again, some guys will do that just to get you out of their hair. Unfair? Nasty? it sure is, but unfortunately, some men cannot or will not be honest with you and simply tell you they want to end it. They would rather not be bothered.
Yes, it hurts. You certainly deserve much better!
What should you do now? Let go of worrying and upsetting yourself! He isn't worth it. Besides, didn't he tell you flat-out that he doesn't care about you any more? There's your answer as to what's going on, and the reason he refuses to get in touch.
I'm sorry, this is very hard for you, and extremely upsetting. But really your best bet is to realize that.
You have tried to make it work, with no good result, and unfortunately, there is nothing more you can do - except to go on with your life, and do what makes you happy.......
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