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female
,
*ushi
writes: I feel that he has no respect for me whatsoever. One day when we were discussing he mentioned his sexual activities with his ex-girlfriend. Even the day after, I tried to make him understand that he should apologize for what he said and he kept saying more about the ex-girlfriend. Also he has threatened me with the gun for three times. I dont think that he will hurt me but he has such a temper. He went to jail and I have an injunction so he cannot be close to me but I still want to continue with the relationship, what should I do?
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female
reader, XxTashaxX +, writes (1 September 2006):
 Dont continue the relationship. hes no good for you. after he threatens you with a gun on more than one occasion why would you want to go back? he obviously doesnt love you as much as you love him why he wouldnt be treating you this way. my advice to you is to move on with your life and find someone who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated.good luckxx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2006): What on earth do you want to continue this relationship for?
He sounds like a first-class jerk, no respect for you, and dangerous as well.
Look out for your own well-being and ditch him, yesterday, so to speak!
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A
male
reader, maxsteel86  +, writes (1 September 2006):
 Hmmm you've stared down the barrel of a gun three times? You must have some serious nerves! Ever considered joining the infantry?
Anyway, I think you gotta be crazy to want to continue a relationship with this guy. In my opinion, I think you should just leave this guy the heck alone. Thats what I think but you say you want to continue your relationship. Dropping the injunction might help... And then maybe persuading him to take up some kind of anger management course would do good but definitely get him to ditch the gun. What does he need it for anyway?
(A friend of mine once said 'guns are like tampons, only pussies need one:-P gosh that cracked me up!!!)
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A
female
reader, stina  +, writes (31 August 2006):
 Hi Sushi,
Plain and simple - walk away from this guy.
You need to leave him because he sounds like he's mentally unstable and dangerous. You don't want to end up finding out that his gun threats were real. And you don't want to be pulled into the kind of world that he seems to live in; he probably doesn't have the best of friends and I don't think you'd want to be sucked into that lifestyle, either. Am I right?
As much as it's going to hurt you at first, you need to do this for yourself. The only reason you keep going back is because you *think* you want to be in that relationship.
Sit down for a moment and consider the positive and negative sides of being in a relationship with him. Do the good times outweigh the bad, like when he talks about his ex and won't apologize for hurting your feelings? Does he put you down or does he tell you you're beautiful, smart, a great girlfriend? Does he do romantic things for you to make you happy because you are number one in his life, or does he threaten you with a gun?
Sometimes not so good relationships are kept because it is comfortable. Sometimes they are kept because one person is made to feel he/she cannot find anyone better. And there are a lot of other reasons, but it seems like you might fall into either one or both of these categories.
Please rethink why you want to stay with this guy who has threatened you and emotionally abused you. Take care and stay safe.
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