A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ive been with my boyfriend for years now..hes always liked to watch pornos,which I'm OK with..i just don't enjoy them myself. So lately we've been having sex only once in about a month or month and a half..Ive tried everything to excite him and get him going but he always has an excuse why he doesn't feel like getting in the mood. So the reason this bothers me is because he regularly watches porno and gets off on it (this i know because we live together don't get me wrong i know its totally normal)..so why would that get him so excited but i cant?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2007): Well er...having seen some porn I can say that what happens in the movie or on the website doesnt happen in the bedroom with any self respecting woman, so if the soldiers at ease around YOU, high five. lol. Sex can be a beautifull thing between two people, in porn its all animal. if he requires more animal, feeling free sex, thats what you have to provide him, if you dont want to then thats fine too, but the relationship with him may need it. He also has no confidence because hes seeng guys of all make and model with women of one body type, that does it too. experience sais stop the porn and the soldier will stand at attention for you again, but if the porn continues the relationship will not change save to get worse. sorry for the bad news But I quit watching porn years ago and it took that long to see the effects of it. Good luck I hope this helps. love yourself enough to at least ask him if he could stop watching porn. its degrading to women and teaches men habbits that are wrong and hurtfull...and all the side effects.
A
female
reader, CarrieMagdelene  +, writes (24 January 2007):
 Good question! One thing that comes to mind is, don't take this the wrong way, selfishness. Not you. Him. Perhaps he's more of a guy who prefers to drop his drawers a few inches, pull out the love handle and give it a workout, pleasuring himself when HE wants. He might not want to pleasure YOU purely because he's a little lazy. Confusing, I know. But just an idea. I only got this from how you said he said he didn't want to get in the mood.
The only way to know for SURE is to ask him about it. (thunder cracks at the dreaded answer of every asker!) I know. Sorry for saying it. :( But it's true. It's him that has HIS answer. The real answer.
Good luck. -Carrie
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