A
female
age
,
*kimber
writes:I'll try to be breif. I have been living with my boyfriend for 8 years, have considered ourselves "married" and have built a complete life with each other. We have been a wonderful and happy couple (or so I thought) until 2 months ago he told me he needed to be "alone" for a while, he wasn't happy, etc. This was completely sudden for me and I was devastated. Come to find out he has been seeing his ex-wife (they have been divorced for 8 years!) and needed to see if he wanted her back again. We were seeing each other toward the end of their marriage (she was dating others too)so I never gave it a second thought, she is emotionally unstable and has a 4 year-old with someone else (she desperately wanted a baby, big contributor to their divorce). Now he has told me he doesn't want her back, it will never work but doesn't know if he wants me either. Please let me know if anyone has ever dealt with this, I am so confused and drained, haven't been able to eat or sleep much since this all happened. Thank-you!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Just Diana  +, writes (18 April 2010):
 Dump him. Move on. Sounds harsh, however it sounds to me like you need to reclaim some of your identity and personal power. get on with your life, irrespective of where he is or is not coming from. You will probably find that this will snap him into the realisation that he does not want to lose you. You need to make you the focus for now! You are a confident, strong woman......now be it! And stop reminiscing over the confusion etc, get more active in life, exercise, see friends, take your self to a movie. I may sound harsh, however, the monebt you recalim your confidence,...you will find he will be at the door knocking and my advice to you then would be, for him to woe you all over again, to proove himself to you again, ...after all YOU are the best thing that will ever happen to him! ..and by the sides of it he is not the best thing that happend to you. If he was...you would not be feeling what you currently are.
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