A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Dear cupid,Me and my Dh started a band long before we got married back in 1998-99. When we started the band we were happy and excited about the future of our music together. We did well and booked and performed some great shows. We recorded a CD and put it out in 2005. Since then I have been nagging the heck outta him to help me record a a new CD. Several of our friends that are in bands put out a CD every year or every other year. Every time we start to record his equipment breaks, computer freezes up...etc. Seems like always some excuse. I ask him to go to a studio and there is always an excuse for that too....he is too nervous and he would be watching the clock because of the money it costs. He has showed me in so many non verbal ways that he is no longer interested in the music other than screwing around or just jamming with friends. During practice he spends 1/2 the time clowning around and making jokes. a few years back he let the band website expire,the copywright expire,and he has pretty much stopped printing out business cards to hand out to clients...So many nonverbal cues that he is no longer interested in our band.I confronted him about it and told him I am tired of his screwing around and sabataging everything. I told him I wanna go solo without him. He got very upset. Why would he get so upset when he has shown me in so many ways he is no longer interested? what should I do about him?
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female
reader, GeeGee255 +, writes (27 February 2011):
 It's hard to be sure but I would guess that he has more or less settled into married life and no longer feels the need to make it the the music business. However, he doesn't want you to go ahead without him either because if you were to be successful it would take you away from him.
So bottom line, I think he is afraid to lose you. Talk to him, its the only way to find out for sure.
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