A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i've been with my boyfriend for 3.5yrs, and we've had our ups and downs. but recently, all we do is just fight.. just about stupid things. like if i dont pick up my phone right away, he'll think i would be cheating on him. and i guess he does have the right to assume that cuz i have cheated on him once in the past. but that was about 3yrs. ago when we first started going out and basically he told me that i have to earn his trust back. and its been like 3yrs. and he still acts like im cheating on him everyday. he controls every part of my life. like if i were to go somewhere out of the house, which rarely happens (because he controls where i go and who i go with and who will be around me), i would have to show him that im not wearing clothes that are too revealing like short shorts or w/e. he would force me to stay on the phone with him if i went to the mall. and if i get him mad, he would text me saying random things just to use up my texts! i feel trapped. and i don't have anyone to talk to because i basically lost all my close friends because of his controlling ways. he says if i break up with him, he'll still be chasing after me. but the crazy thing is.. i love the guy. :(
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2008): Here read this, as Emily has said this guy is not normal... http://www.dearcupid.org/question/warning-signs-youre-dating-a-loser.html
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (9 July 2008):
Yep Diovan is right. You need to get out. This guy has manipulated you so much that he's your whole world. You feel like you love him in the same way that hostages in the jungles of Congo fall in love with their captors.
You're his slave, and his prisoner.
NORMAL MEN DO NOT TREAT THEIR GIRLS LIKE THIS!! The guy is a nut job.
Call your friends, apologise and tell them how he's controlled you so you couldn't see them. Call your family and ask to move home for a while. Then get out. Call the police if he tries anything. And tell the person you are going to to call the police if you don't show up by a certain time.
If he tries to stalk you or get you back then get a restraining order on him.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2008): You need to leave this guy. He is too controling. It dosen't matter if you love him, it dosen't matter if your frightened, you have to leave him because no human being deseves to live like this. Ok you had an affair, stupid, but it happens, he either forgives, forgets or leaves. To keep you chained to him as a slave is unfair, and against international law. You have a right to go out with whoever you want to, you have a right to wear whatever you want. What he is doing is dangerous to your mental health. You need your friends, they love you. This guy is way to possessive, you do not belong to him, you belong to yourself. Finish the relationship, find your friends and tell them you were wrong. If he comes near you after that, or makes any threats then go to the police. This guy is dangerous, you are trapped, your a slave.
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