A
female
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*r Cupid
writes:I could really use an outsiders point of view so please if you have time take a read.....I met a guy about 9 months ago after coming out of a long relationship. At first he was everything I needed, fun, exciting, nice but I never saw much of a future in it as I had just come out of something serious.We stopped talking to eachother for a little while after about 4 months and then got back in touch again. Shortly after getting in touch with him I found out that on a night when he was supposed to have met me he slept with someone else and it was my birthday. I decided to put the past behind me and just see where we ended up but about 2 months later he pretended to be out of the area and slept with the same girl again (even though I was waiting at home for him). When I found this out I was devastated but still decided to give it a go. Since then things have deteriorated quickly. He is rude to me, he does what he wants, sometimes he goes out and doesn't come back until 8am the next day even if I've begged him not to do it, he talks to me like dirt in front of people we know, I've seen emails with him asking girls out for drinks, he's told me he hasn't spoken to his ex and then I see on his phone that he has. This is just skimming the surface....! I know you're probably thinking the answer here is clear but when we get on we really get on and we have a good time and everything is lovey dovey but just lately that is rare. I'm older than him by 6 years so I'm feeling like if I leave him he will be out having fun partying all the time with girls and I will be indoors lonely.Recently I met someone else and he seems nice but he is getting bored with never seeing me (he doesn't know that I'm with someone) and we're losing momentum. He is probably going to lose interest altogether soon and I think that would be a shame as we seem to get along.I try to tell the guy I'm with that it's over but he never believes me because I never follow through with anything and then when we do split I feel terribly sad and I worry about what he is up to and when he calls me we end up back together.The majority of our arguments that cause us to split conveniently take place on a Friday, he will go out all weekend and then come back to me on Sunday.I've never let anyone treat me like this in my life and I don't know what is wrong with me. Because of his lying and cheating I've become miserable, aggressive, paranoid, jealous and possessive. Instead of supporting me he throws all these things in my face like I'm mad and sometimes I do feel like i'm going mad.He knew what I went through with my ex (which isn't a patch on what he does to me) and yet he thinks its ok to treat me like this.Please someone tell me what you think? I'd be so grateful.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2010): i have the same problem going on, its very hard and i cant leave him. everytime he does something wrong he askes for forgiveness and i come back. its hard but the heart wants what the heart wants. try life without him.. and if u like it better than theres your answer
A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (7 June 2010):
 Have you got daughters, sisters, girlfriends.. what would you tell them if someone was treating them like this.
If you stay get ready for more disrespect, more hurt, more cheating and less and less good times.
Guy is using you, you allow it, and this relationship has nothing to offer you except sadness and pain.
You stay, why? Because your frightened of having a good life?
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