A
female
age
30-35,
*2121
writes:i have been with my boyfriend for 17 months. he told me yesterday that he has cheated on me. he told me the reason why he cheated was because we were not getting on and he wanted to finnish. but he realised he still loved me and still wanted to be with me and he made a big mistake. he said the girl did not mean anything and that he had never met her before and it would be unlikely if he saw her again. the reason why i am considering getting back with him is because he told me that he had cheated and that it really hurt him and he felt so guilty he couldn't keep lying to me so this suggest to me that he wuld not be in so much of a hurry to do it agen. pls help what shall i do give him another chance or not?
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female
reader, useless  +, writes (19 January 2007):
 well if you still love him then maybe you should give him another chance, but not just like that. Probably if you want to or should you can always cheat on him back and make him feel the same way you do..because you'll never get it through your head and if your with him again you'll be thinking of the past and that's not fair that he won't feel the same way you do..trust me i've kind of been to that situiation already and maybe ther peple too..And maybe also you should take some time for yourself to cool off and forget what he's done to you. And if he plans on playing you again then what's the use of going back out again because you just taught him a valuable lesson that he shouldn't do that again. If your not planning to play him then just get it over your head cuz because there's nothing you can do about it now and probably he's the only guy you think is for you.
-p.s- if you do plan on playing him back don't forget to tell him and that what you did to him was just karma feeling for what he's done to you.
A
female
reader, fauldsire +, writes (19 January 2007):
First, I think you should find out why you weren't getting on and he wanted to finish with you, then you can both discuss it and hopefully resolve it, or else the problem will still be there if you get back together. I believe that only you can decide if you're willing to take him back, but if you do, it has to be with clear ground rules - honesty at all times, discussing problems not running away from them, no mobiles phones on silent or carried everywhere cos that'll feed any anxieties you have, take time to spend time together socially and set a target date for re-examining your relationship. That'll let him see that youre not making a permanent decision and being soft!
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (18 January 2007):
 It depends. Can you forgive him completely? Will you be able to trust him again? If you can, and incidentally that makes you an amazingly strong person, then get back with him but if you can't, and you're equally amazing for being able to admit it to yourself, then it might not be worth the hassle of getting back together and then it all falling apart when you realise you can't go back to the way things were. Whatever you decide to do make sure he knows cheating will never be forgiven again.
CD
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