A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:basically my bf cheated on me for a couple of weeks just kissing nothing like sex or anything then when one of his friends told me he broke up with me but then just a couple hours later was begging me to forgive him and give him another chance. after alot of crying from both of us we made up and hes been trying to get me to forgive him for about 6 months now. at first i didnt no if i could do it but then for a while everything was back to normal and getting better and he was getting my trust back but then a couple weeks ago i saw the girl he cheated on me with and i just got so angry and upset because i just started thinking bout everything he said and all the lies. i really want it to work but i cant stop thinking about it and its getting me really down i see the girl at college sometimes and it just makes me feel like i want the earth to open up and swallow me.i cant stand this feeling and want it to end but i dont want to end it with my bf as were so good together and he was truely sorry but what if i can never forget about this i dont want it hunting me forever and then theres the saying once a cheater always a cheater which makes me think i dont want to be cheated on again later on in life when were married and have kids. where engaged and always talk about having a family together one day so its def a seriouse relationship. i really dont no what to do i need some advice. should i stay and try to forget what happened and try to forgive my boyfriend????? any opinion please say
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male
reader, OnewingedAngel  +, writes (18 November 2008):
Well you know, I can relate. My ex GF...def cheated on me. I def had to get over it. Although sometimes I went about it all wrong. Seeing that reminder, her, is something to truly piss you off. I believe its possible to continue AFTER you've truly taken a mental inventory and decide whatyou truly will and won't tolerate in your life any further. Maybe take some time apart and see how you feel after 2 weeks. Get to two weeks. Clear your mind. It's amazing what can happen. It's HARD to start though. But it could be the very best thing in the long term. MAKE SURE THERE IS A CLEAR UNDERSTANDING FOR BOTH OF YOU. There are articles all over the net by psychologists with steps to forgiveness and ensuring it doesn't continue. PLEASE google it. like " relationship cheating overcoming" That is how I found it last time. Check out my question, " Infidelity and physical abuse...is this fixable?" its under Infidelity. Best of luck. remember, don't FORGET what happened, cope and grow.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2008): I know it hurts but at least it didn't go beyond kissing. Sounds like he really regretted it and would hate to lose you. Tell him if he ever does it again you will not give him any more chances, and in the meantime try to put it behind you and give him the benefit of the doubt.
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