A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay, I've been with this guy for over a year and have been sexually active from about 4 months in - we were both virgins.Anyway, when we have sex he never finishes inside me, and pulls out - even if we use condoms. He's scared of me getting pregnant as we're both only 18. Is this normal? What can I do, because I don't want this to be a habit he can't break - I want kids when we're older.
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male
reader, doublejack  +, writes (27 August 2012):
I think this is normal, especially for a guy who doesn't have much experience and is very cautious about pregnancy. As long as your boyfriend is pulling out right before he finishes, instead of a minute or more before he finishes, then it is fine. Basically, if intercourse with a condom on can get him to the point of having an orgasm, then he will have no trouble at all finishing inside without a condom - if and when the time comes to start a family.
Best of luck!
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (27 August 2012):
 It's always better to be more cautious rather than less.
A few things. 1) have you thought about getting an IUD, depo shot, or implant? They are VERY effective. You can use them alone or you can add in 2) are you willing to get an abortion if you accidentally got pregnant? If yes, tell him.
There are methods other than condoms and pulling out that are more effective. Why not go to a family planning or women's clinic together to talk over your options?
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A
female
reader, katiekate +, writes (27 August 2012):
 Also, you should track your cycle and find out which days each month you ovulate. There's only a very small window of when pregnancy can occur anyway (something like 48 hours)... There's lots of information online and even phone apps that can track your cycle for you. That way, he can just be careful during the "danger" period, and ejaculate inside you the other times (at least with a condom on, instead of pulling out).
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A
female
reader, katiekate +, writes (27 August 2012):
Why don't you get on birth control so that the chances of getting pregnant are virtually non-existent? Birth control plus a condom, both used correctly, should ensure that an accidental pregnancy would not happen. If you start taking the pill, he'll probably be more comfortable and be able to loosen up.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2012): If you're using condoms then the chances of you getting pregnant are pretty slim. Condoms are the best way to guard against pregnancy and STI's. Just relax and enjoy it.
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