A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ok...my boyfriend was with a girl for five years, aparently it was a rocky relationship and she broke up with him. He persued a couple of relationships since, then went two years without anything. he's been with me now for about eight months, and has made his life plans to include me. i know he loves me. last night he was affectionately humming a tune and the words 'lovely laura' (his ex girlfriend's name) came out! he often makes up words to go with his tunes but never has his ex girlfriends name been said! he was very tired, and he said he was looking for something to go with 'lovely' but he fumbled. apparently. i know he paniked because he retaliated with 'you said your ex's name in your sleep!' which i didn't. he tried to explain and i wasnt having any of it. he then got pissed off. why did he mention her name? should i be worried?any advice greatly appreciated, thank you.
View related questions:
broke up, ex girlfriend, his ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2008): As others have said, don't worry about it. It might happen again sometime. I was married to my first wife for 11 years and I started dating the woman who is now my wife about 6 months after we separated. I called her by my first wife's name about 6 times over the first few months and she called me by a past boyfriend's name once. Yeah, it kind of hurts, but it is just a mistake and doesn't mean that the person (boyfriend in your case) has any desire at all to be with the other person. I know that it didn't in our cases.
When he did it, he likely got difensive and that is why he got angry. He was probably worried that you will think that it means that he doesn't care for you or wants his ex more. Both are very unlikely. You put him on the spot and he had to come up with a way to defend himself. It's not his fault and it's not yours. Just forget about it and if he does it again just make a joke of it. That is what my wife did to me. It reminded me in a non-threatening way. I was embarrassed but had no need to defend myself.
A
female
reader, MARISSA  +, writes (26 May 2008):
 Like you said he probly just said because he was very tired .I mean sweetie you just cant stop liken someone after a five year relationship theres no way .But thats probly not it he loves you and you know it .But just dont worry about it unless it happens more then once then worry ..If its just this one time then its all good!
best of luck
MARISSA
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2008): I don't think there's much to worry about. You seem like a good couple and he seems like a lovely guy. They haven't been with each other for two years. You never forget your first love and he will always remember the good and the bad times they spent together. Just remember that although they share good memories, they also share bad ones and that their relationship didn't work.
A lot of people will still remember their ex and have them pop into their head every once in a while, they were with each other for a LONG time. But he has moved on and is with you now and just because she still comes into his mind every once in a while, it does not meant hat he is still attracted to her.
...............................
A
female
reader, without_reason +, writes (26 May 2008):
 This has happened to me in the past.. I tend to do it when I'm in a situation I have been with an ex..
He had been with the girl a long time, he wont forget her.. But as Isabella stated, it was just a slip of the tongue.. nothing to worry about.
Plus, you seem happy, I hope everything goes well :)
Take care
...............................
A
female
reader, Isabella1974  +, writes (26 May 2008):
 Hi there,
honestly i dont think you have anything to worry about. It was just a slip of the tongue and as you said he was tired and he probably said it without even thinking.
He has made his life plans that includes you, it definitely sounds like he loves you, as you mentioned he panicked, he sounds like a darling, i think it was just a slip of the tougue and the fact that he panicked suggests to me that he was afraid that you would be upset..and he was right.
Please dont dwell on this, it means nothing and dont be worrying about it. Dont be to angry with him, it was just something silly that came out so try not to be to hard on him.
You sound like you both really love each other, so enjoy your relationship, its sounds like a good one.
Take care
...............................
|
