A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Im having real big trouble getting over my ex, we are still friends and talk everyday, we've even met up to have sex twice(I KNOW ITS WRONG)he then goes and says to me that you have to move on, the think is hes always the one who rings me first telling me problams with his kinda new gf there not out yet just seeing how things go with spending time together, im really confused as part of me still likes him then the other ppart of me wants to be mates he split with me for this other girlThen last monday he even asked for a kiss which i gave him but only on the lips Please help
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2008): hi, iam also on the same track as my bf calls me and say that he wanted to meet me for sex and when asked to him could he leave that new gal he said no its not possible!! iam mad cant forget him iam suffering wat to do help me plzzzz..
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2008): He is only thinking with one head and that's why he calls you. Men care about 1 THING! And you're giving him that 1 thing and he knows he's going to get it. As hard as it is you need to walk away. I know it's easier said than done. Believe me!! Been there, done that! In the end, I'm ok, I've moved on, and I've found someone SOOO much better! The sex is better too!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2008): HE'S USING YOU! I agree with everyone else, his problems re his and his alone. Have respect for yourself. If she's (the other girlfriend) isn't giving it up to him then your a fool to do the same. I REPEAT! HE IS USING YOUR BODY AS A FREE SEMEN DUMP! Don't let that guy have you his way when, and however many times he feels like it. If he won't treat you right then there's another guy out there who will. KICK HIS SAD BUTT TO THE CURB! That's my opinion, I hope it helps
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A
female
reader, hibiscus  +, writes (16 November 2008):
I agree with everything everyone else said so far, especially Q's statement that "the problems he is having with his new girlfriend (or whatever she currently is) are HIS problems". Honestly, don't answer when he calls, don't text, don't meet up. Honey, just ignore his a**. I know right now you might not want to really hear what we have to say, but in time you will truly appreciate how much of a jerk this guy is and how much you deserve better. What nerve does he have treating you this way. Trust me, he is not the best darn thing since cheesecake (or whatever your guilty pleasures are).You can never get over an ex if you remain "friends" especially if you are sleeping with him. You are the one who has invested so much time in this which is why you are hurting and he is treating you like crap. He is doing this because HE DOES NOT CARE!!! PERIOD! Stop wasting your time and MOVE ON. There so many guys out there. Even if you are single for a while......MOVE ON. You DESERVE BETTER!
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A
female
reader, Teacake  +, writes (16 November 2008):
 Cut him out of your life and let him realize that he lost a good thing. Men get too used to keeping women waiting around for them. If he can't decide, you decide for him.
Just tell him you aren't interested in a man who treats you this way. The other girl is probably being used too. He is obviously a user and very unkind to say to you after sex that you need to move on. That's absurd behavior!
Tell him you have moved on and bye bye. Otherwise this will go on and on and you cry your eyes out over a selfish creep.
Men have to learn they can't treat women like this. If you allow him to use you this way, you are teaching him its okay to treat women like trash.
I wish I had been strong with my ex and walked away because it only got worse!
You will feel better in the long run and will have the self confidence later on when the next guy treats you like that. Never put up with this behavior! If he loves you and thinks he lost you, don't take him back. Make him realize there is a price to pay. You will always find another man, there's billions of them!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2008): This guy is a jerk! He is using you, and you are allowing him to. He's keeping you on the "back burner" while he checks out this new girl. He doesn't want to let go of you completely until he thinks he has someone "better" in her. His behavior (and yours, by having sex with him) is destroying your self-respect, and self-esteem. It may feel nice while he's with you, but how do you feel when he leaves, knowing he's going to his "other girl"?????? Walk away before the damage is done...if you wait for him to decide whether he wants you or her, you are sending a msg. that he can do anything and you will stick by him. If a guy thinks that, his treatment towards you will get worse and worse...before you know it you'll be sitting home crying and wondering where he is and what he is doing. Don't condone his behavior...it's hurting you...move on and find someone who knows he loves you and wants to be with you!
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A
female
reader, AuntBeth +, writes (16 November 2008):
 Hun, you need to start respecting yourself!This guy is complete trash: he's treating you (and this other girl) horrificly. You have to start being firm with him. Don't waste anymore of your love on him... no more sex, yeah?If you want to remain friends: good on you, girl. You're more understanding than I am. But... so long as you stay FRIENDS. All the time romance is happening between you, you're not moving on. Keep it clean, keep it simple, and be happy. You deserve it, hun. xx
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