A
female
age
26-29,
*lgardner1
writes:There is this guy I know. We are friends, but fairly new friends for the past 3 or so months. He is a really nice guy, very easy to talk to. Whenever we talk, he always tells me personal things about himself. I'm talking really personal things that he doesn't tell anyone else. When we talk he always brings up something about sex. Either it's a sexual innuendo or the other day he was telling me about his first sexual experience out of the blue. He always brings it up. Idk if he is just horny or if he is looking for something sexual with me? Need advice.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (6 July 2017):
 He wants to have sex with you and he is testing the waters.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2017): Honey men are men sex drives them, personal thing he's trying to hard to be with you go carfully
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2017): Yes, he wants you!
Remember- the 'dating' world for men is just as tough as for women. There are a whole list of things we should and shouldn't do, say, be- each woman expects a different balance of all of those when a guy is trying to chat her up, so to speak. But, in your case, it sounds like he's looking for just sex. He's hoping you'll reciprocate his sex talk, which he would then take a cue that you're interested.
Are you interested in him in that way? If so, then decide if you want sex or a relationship. If it's sex, join in with the sex talk. If it's a relationship, or if you're not interested at all, ask him to tone the sex talk down. See how you get on without the inuendo!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2017): He wants to have sex with you. Period.
And I am not so sure he wants a relationship along with the sex.
I would be very careful here.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (30 June 2017):
 I fully agree too. YouWish nailed it.
Sounds like the "sharing" of REALLY personal stuff is his way to make you feel you are getting to know him and trust him... I'd chill on that aspect a bit.
Are you INTERESTED in him as anything more than a friend? If so, again... I'd take YouWish's advice and go WAY WAY slow. I can see this guy being only REALLY interested in "hitting that" and then "befriending" another girl.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (30 June 2017):
 I agree with the other aunts. He's both horny AND he's wanting sex with you. If he is *always* bringing up sex into every conversation you have with him (i.e. You: "I heard on the news about the minimum wage being raised next week" Him: "Yep, it rose just like my penis"), then that might be a warning sign of a possible sexual addiction, whether it's to porn or to people or just constant thinking about it.
I would be remiss if I didn't point out some extremely important things, as you have said that he is a new friend (Three month friendship), but he's talking to you about "really personal things":
1. True intimacy takes time and trust. Some people "open the kimono" or disclose personal information in order to get you to trust too soon. You're writing to us because your guard is up in response to this. THAT's a good thing. Never override your gut feeling, and your gut feeling is telling you to keep your guard up!
2. If a guy is into YOU, he's going to be interested in who you are as a person. Subjects will span a wide variety of things, not just sexual things. If he's the one doing the talking, and the talking steers toward sex all the time, this is a red flag that he's not interested in YOU as a person, but rather merely USING your body for the thing he's REALLY interested in, and that's sexual self-gratification. BE CAREFUL.
3. While we're on the subject of friendship, WHY are you two friends in the first place? Are you close together in ages? How do you know each other? You say that you're new friends, so why are you friends as opposed to his asking you out on a date and beginning a relationship that way?? IS HE WITH someone else in his life?
4. If the answer to #3 is "YES", does she know about you, and how would she feel about his constantly talking about sex with another woman?? A lot of times, a guy will call a girl a "friend", but steer the "friendship" towards "adding benefits" by mimicking a friendship and pushing a false sense of "intimacy" by grooming you to wanting to hook up.
5. It goes without saying -- unless you WANT a casual no-strings-attached sexual partner, then like the others have said, tell him to slow down on the sex talk. You can be nice and say "You know, there are 100-million different things to talk about! Sex is not the only thing that exists in this world!".
6. Finally, if he starts pressing the issue with you and you aren't turned off by the idea, DO A BACKGROUND CHECK or at least Google the guy. He seems to be a "fast mover", and that may not bode very well. I keep getting the vibe that he has a girlfriend already or has some situation where telling the world that you're his "friend" suits him better than to do things the right way and ask you out and get to know you like a man interested in making a REAL connection with you.
Please be careful. Go slowly with this one, and remember, a platonic friend doesn't constantly talk about sex with the person he or she is friends with!
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (30 June 2017):
 I think both. If he's always talking about sex, then his mind is all full of sex. So he's a horny guy and he wants to have sex with you.
I think I would tell him to cool it down with the sex talk.
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A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (30 June 2017):
 Yes, he wants to have sex with you. I don't see any other reason why he would keep bringing this up.
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