A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Why can't I just tell this guy to leave me alone, I have gotton into a situation where I am becoming a FWB with a guy at work so I have stayed away from him but he keeps making an effort to speak to me, it's killing me because I like him so so much I found out he already has a FWB so I have been avoiding him but I really like him and can't tell him to leave me alone, help!He doesn't see it as a probelm but I do, he already has a FWB.
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female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (24 November 2009):
Lord I have such massive issues with the whole FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS set up. To me, it's just a whole store of trouble and I genuinely believe that women especially cannot help themselves but get emotionally involved once things have gone so far.
My advice to you would be to cut it off dead. If this chap has only known you sexually, it's doubtful he will ever see you in any other light. Also being sexually involved with someone you work with will make things incredibly difficult because you are forced to see that person on a daily basis...and if the s**t hits the fan, your going to be stuck for a place to avoid them.
You could risk telling him that you have feelings for him, but if he is already having casual sex with someone else, it doesn't bode well for you does it? In my opinion he sounds like a complete nightmare and definitely NOT the kind of bloke a girl can rely on. If he approaches you again, tell him you've moved on and are not looking back!!!
It's going to be a bit painful and slightly uncomfortable but you will thank yourself that you saved yourself from such misery. Another problem with having co-worker sex is discretion. If he gets annoyed or angry, he may start shouting his mouth off, so he is best avoided.
You may think you like him, but really you probably just enjoying the attention...seriously you are better than that and you don't need him.
Best of Luck
Aunty Em xxx
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