A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am a tour guide and last year I met a guy working in one of the places I visit regularly. He is a very friendly person anyway but always made a big fuss of me, giving me a big welcome whenever I showed up, which my clients liked very much. We became friends, seeing each other socially now and again and during the times I have stayed over at his house, we have shared a bed, but he has never initiated any sex. I was at his house a few days ago and the situation was the same, but he has three bedrooms and could have made me a bed elsewhere. The thing that is a little upsetting now is that when i arrive at the place he works with my clients, he all but ignores me and it is often one of the other guys working there who steps forward to greet us. Sometimes he'll look at me and quickly look away again, but once we are seated he is fine for the rest of our visit. I so much miss the welcome I once enjoyed on arrival and realise how much this is bothering me and yet, when I spend an evening with him, we talk for hours. He also tells my clients when I am at this place what a great guide I am, and today told them what a great cook I am, so I can't understand why he holds back when I arrive. I find it very strange! It makes me feel a little awkward immediately but we should be natural together and I feel today okay with everything. What should I say to him without aggravating the situation?
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female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (20 August 2008):
 It's possible that he was told not to be overly friendly with you by his boss, maybe it was considered a problem at work?
I would ask him if his new reticence is a result of that, and see what he says. Is it possible he has a girlfriend somewhere? Or, I really hesitate to ask this one, a boyfriend?
As Diovan says, the only way to find out is to ask him. You don't have to be accusatory, you can ask as if you were only mildly curious about it, that it's not a big deal to you.
Good luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2008): I don't know what's going on, you just need to ask him what the hell is going on. At a pinch, it could be one of two things. He really likes you, but he's shy and he dosen't want to risk your friendship. Or he's just a friend, the friendliness and the bed sharing might have given you the wrong idea so now he's backing off. Don't ask us, go and ask him, I don't know so you'll have to just come out and ask him why he is acting this way.. Blessings.
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