A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Have any of you out there met someone, who's not the person you're with at the moment, who you thought was your soulmate and you his/hers, but for reasons beyond your control, can't be with that person right now.How did you deal with it?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2008): Yeah. I had started dating this guy who I had had a crush years before. In the meantime one of my guy friends started dating a friend of ours.
Then me and my guy friend went on a camping trip (at the beach) and kind of fell inlove (we'd always had a crush on each other but I think it took us seeing each other dating other people to act on it).
So when we got back we had to play it cool for his girl and my guy, just to not hurt their feelings. But I think they could tell. Cause when you are inlove with someone, that person is the first you think of to impress or to help out or to look at. So he and I would always gravitate toward each other automatically. That's how it is. Immediately he broke up with her, though. And a few days after that I broke up with my guy. And then it was just the two of us...
We had so much fun. One time we went camping (again) and I woke up in the morning and I didn't see him in our tent. So I walked to the beach and I didn't find him, but what I did find was he had written really big in the sand our names. To this day that is like the best thing I have ever woken up to. I really liked him. He didn't turn out to be my soulmate, but he definitely showed me what to look for in a guy.
A
female
reader, HonningKanin  +, writes (3 July 2008):
 Hello,
Whilst I didn't meet my husband while I was my partner, I had just left a relationship of 4 years and still living with him until he found his own place. So in a sense I was still slightly stuck so in a way I understand how you feel.
My advise to you is if you feel the way you do about your partner you have to really analyze why it is you are feeling that way. Are you bored? Are you two not communicating? Are you two just not getting along? Once you found the reason why you are feeling the way you do, exclude this other person first, and way out your options. If you are just bored and there is nothing else wrong with the relationship wonder first if there is any way to save your relationship by making it more exciting and re-igniting the passion you two might have once shared. If that doesn't work then it would be time to say good-bye. Life is too short to live unhappily.
With your age up I may dare say you might be married you might not be, but this advise for both if you are single or married.
Once you have left your partner only then could you ever consider this other person. If you feel this person is your soulmate I would say you wouldn't want to taint the idea by having an affair. This person shouldn't be the drive of the end of the relationship either. It could be seen as a wake up call, but not the drive. If a relationship can be saved and if it is worth saving you should try. One you can hold up your hands and say you tried only then could a break up bejustified.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2008): Handle the situation with emotional maturity;
be honest and realistic you cannot be toghether and accept that;
if you have an agreement to remain friends and neither does anything to cross the line of friendship; (avoid physicall intimacy); well then you can have a friend for life.
It worked for me; we are best friends for more then 10 years!
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