A
female
age
26-29,
*nit Blossom
writes:Basically, me and my boyfriends have been together for about a month now. We met on a youth program that had a 3 weeks during the summer and now runs every Sunday. Before he asked me out, we became really close friends, we were inseparable for most of the time, that's when it started between us over those 3 weeks. However it seems that at the beginning of our relationship, we had a strong love for one another, we'd message each other 24/7 and we even meet up after college (We're not at the same college). But now, he talks to me less and less through messaging and in real life, our conversations are now very short, its not as if its really awkward but its not the same as it once was.I thought, personally, tat he might have been beginning to lose interest in me because maybe I was being too clingy on my part so I tried to give him space in the youth club but I feel as though that I've neglected him rather than given him space :'(It doesn't help that everyone won't stop asking us if we've kissed yet because we're both very shy people so we're taking the relationship slowly. But I've recently wondered, doe he maybe feel that its actually me not being interested rather than taking it slowly? I fear that's what he may think even though I love him to pieces but I know I'm the person who it will take time for to gain the confidence to kiss him even if its just a goodbye peck.The only thing that keeps me hoping that he still interested is the fact that he still will message me asking "How was my day" and "Good Morning" It may seem generic but for me, it shows that he still thinks of me, or at least I hope its what it means. Last time we saw each other we barely talked at all So I'm wondering now, is he beginning to lose interest in me now? Am I being to over cautious about him? And is there any advice I could have to help fix our relationship because I really don't want to loose him; we got along so well before, I just want it to be like that again. Thank you.
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female
reader, Mnit Blossom +, writes (23 September 2014):
Mnit Blossom is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you so much Katie, it seems that unfortunately, that all this is pointing towards your theory :( I'm going to see how things go this Sunday between us and see if thing have gotten any better or worse. Thanks again :)
A
female
reader, Mnit Blossom +, writes (22 September 2014):
Mnit Blossom is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you both CMMP and WiseOwlE for the advice, I really appreciate it.
CMMP, I will try my best not to get myself so worried all the time about what he's thinking and just return to being ow I normally am. And thanks for the reassurance, I'm glad its normal for the excitement in relationships to die down, that way I know its not me causing it :)
And WiseOwlE, I'm beginning to think that you're right in terms of it was all just for the summer thing. It's really upsetting but the way he's acting is beginning to point to that :(
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A
female
reader, Katie-Lynn  +, writes (22 September 2014):
 Tell me something. Were you two ever exclusive? Like did he physically ask you to be his girlfriend using those words? Cause he could very easily just be dating around if you're not exclusive meaning the reason why he still asks how you are because he is clearly still interested but taking his time thinking if he wants to be exclusive with you as he's dating other women. On the other hand, if you two 'are' exclusive, I'd say that not texting all the time is something that was bound to happen after being with you a good while. He knows you're solid so men figure they don't need to constantly reach you and so on (I'm dealing with this in mine actually) because he knows that he has you. In the beginning it's all about making you like him and shower you with constant praise. However, the trust is clearly there so it is therefore not needed anymore. Would you freak out if a friend didn't text you all the time? Well same thing. Men are like this and see it as needy. However, since you included that you hardly talk when together,this is a whole another story then. If what you say is true and you're not overrreacting by how he talks to your face then yea, I'd say he's not that into you. At least my bf, when we're together, treats me like a princess to my face even though he's not much of a texter. My gut is telling me that he sends you the occasional text asking how you are so you don't suspect him and to help himself feel less guilty as he's cheating or looking around for another woman while he's with you. I'm sorry this is happening to you. I'd hate this very much. Best of luck to you and see you around.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (22 September 2014):
The best advice someone can give you is to relax, stop worrying so much and be yourself.
If he likes you, he'll like you for the real you. If he's losing interest already then you are just not right for each other at this time. Learning to realize that someone isn't right for you is a good trait to have.
Also, it's normal for the excitement to die down. If only it lasted forever!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2014): If you're both the same age, I think his interest was just for the summer. He wanted someone to be close to and to hangout with. Girls tend to take relationships more seriously than boys at your age. So he may not have been as into you, as you were into him.
I don't think not kissing him had much to do with it. If he really wanted to kiss you, I think he would have been pretty persistent about it. He knows you're shy. He is contacting you less and less to let you know he wants to move on, and maybe see other girls. He didn't mean for it to be a long-term thing.
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