A
female
age
30-35,
*44endlix
writes:I'm currently in a long distance relationship and we've been apart for the past month but have lived together for four months proceeding him leaving and were a couple. He's gone to the other side of the country for four months so that he can renew his visa and stay with me in Australia for another year while we sort out options of maybe applying for a Partner Visa or him studying here on a Student Visa (we're both 19, I'm Australian and he's Korean). When we're together it's really wonderful but sometimes we tend to fight and when we fight, it's really dramatic but usually we fix it within a day. Our fights are generally to do with cultural problems and my extensive sexual experience and many lovers with him only having one other girlfriend in his life. He seems to be jealous of all the sex I've had and holds a constant grudge against me because of it and I think this leads to him being distrustful of me.He's the typical Korean male, very loving and willing to take care of their partner but fiery tempered, jealous and controlling. As a result so that we don't fight while he's gone, I've made sure I don't drink or go out or do anything of the such and usually work 6 days a week and stay at home all day and night.We used to call eachother everyday and talk for hours even but he hasn't called me in days and when I ask him to call me he never does and just says he's too tired or some other excuse. If he really loves me can't he give me 10 seconds of his time so I can hear his voice? I really do miss it. Lately his messages have been disjointed and lacking detail or affection apart from the usual 'I Love You'.He told me he's going out drinking with his friends and he still hasn't called me despite me asking him to for the past few days.Is something up?He's working at a farm and there's not much for him to do, he's living in a house with 30 other Koreans (male and female), he always goes on about being bored and having nothing to do but all of a sudden he doesn't have half a minute for me...
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female
reader, Level22 +, writes (22 November 2010):
 Give him the gift of missing you, your past is your past and you should not have to justify that to him. There is nothing you can do to change that. Your relationship starts from the time you meet. Cultural differences are very strong. Sounds like he has an inner battle going on within himself. And you should not have to stop doing what you enjoy, he is the one with the immaturity to deal with. A lot of asians have not had many sex partners I have known 30 year olds who have only had one or none at all. I think he is having a "cave" moment, leave him in there, don't go in after him. He is using mind control and it is working because now you have shut yourself off from what you enjoy doing. Don't contact him. He will be back.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (20 November 2010):
 Ok you need to call him and ask him what is wrong, just be blunt and tell him you have noticed him getting distant with you and ask him has he met someone else.
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