A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:When you meet a girl in a bar or club what diffrenciates her from being the girl you want to make your girlfriend, or the girl who could be some fun?I know many guys (some being friends who do this) meet girls in clubs and assume she's down to sleep with them, or that if they see her a few times and play it right that again.. She will sleep with them. Yet some guys I know have met a girl in a club and end up in a relationship with them, they find that they like this girl enough to actually get to know her, see where things can go and want to make her their girlfriend.What is it that separates these two woman? Because a gorgeous, well dressed funny and smart girl who respects herself, somehow can still be viewed as 'a bit of fun'. So I can't understand what is it that changes the way a guy thinks of her?Especially if they keep meeting in bars and clubs, because a few of my friends kept meeting the guys there as it made things more comfortable for them. Yet they never did anything with the guy, he just kept wanting to see them again and now these people are in relationships that have formed from clubs?So guys, what is it that differentiates the two? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (17 January 2012):
 Interesting post here. To be very honest, I previously stereotyped all western women who went to clubs as whores. However, that stereotype changed for me over a year ago when I met a lovely irish girl. When I go to a club, I select a target. That target so far has usually been a one nite stand however that doesnt mean I wouldnt want a relationship. I look for a girl dressed scantly and I prefer shes with one other girl vs a group. She does not have to be drinking but thats a rare occurrence, most women in clubs drink. Third, I read her body language when she talks to men before I approach. If she's very flirtatious, very active with her hands when talking, sitting cross legged at the bar with her back straight or slumped over with an elbow on one knee. Thats the final thing that tells me how I need to talk to her. The irish girl was the only one I never approached, she opened me actually which was a nice change of pace. She was dressed attractively, not provocatively, had makeup on, drank, danced her ass off, and arrived with a huge group of friends which told me she had little to no intention of leaving with a guy. Its how women carry themselves, you just read it, take signals, and plan your approach and conversation.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2012): Guys will ALWAYS try to get a girl to put out. The reasons for this are because there are 3 possible ways the guy might feel:
1. He wants sex right away and does not want a GF.
2. He wants sex right away and he would still see the girl as a potential GF even if he gets sex quickly.
3. He wants a GF who makes guys wait. That means he has to at least make a try for quick sex in order to find out where her boundaries really are.
The only reason a guy would not push for sex quickly would be to encourage a girl to make him wait even though she would have been willing to sleep with him quickly. These guys don't exist.
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A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (17 January 2012):
 I'd just like to say that I'm in this situation at the moment, I thought at the time it was a one night stand, but we kept in contact, started texting and talking on the phone a lot more and started to meet up.
The reason for me was simply because she kept in contact. I was physically attracted to her so there was something there and the more we spoke, there was some chemistry there aswell and since meeting up it's been going great.
So basically to sum up, it's more of how willing both parties are to stay in contact after the 'fun'.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (16 January 2012):
 I know am not a guy but I thought I would add my opinion to this. I honestly do not think there is a need to differentiate between the two. Some guys just want fun while others are looking for a relationship. Although most guys are going to try to get the girl to put out, no matter who they are. But if they take there time and get to know the girl that is then when they decide that they want to be with her. It really just depends on if a guy falls for the girl or not. Every guy has different expectations for a potential girlfriend, so really you cannot put all of the reasons in to one category.
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