A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm at university, and I met this guy through mutual friends before we broke up for Christmas last year. I've noticed he's always staring at me (to the point that it's embarrassing), but, when I talk to him, it seems awkward sometimes although he's quite nice. However, he's a bit of a ladies' man so I'm not sure whether I should make anything of it or not.I've seen him around quite a lot recently at parties and such, and I'm always catching him staring at me (when I turn and look at him, he always looks away and seems a bit embarrassed), but when I don't really acknowledge it I've noticed him looking at me out of the corner of my eye for ages. He's always smiling at me too.We were both at a party two weeks ago and he "liked" the fact I was going on Facebook. He seems to be the type of guy who likes loads of things, but I've never chatted to him on there and added him months ago when we barely knew each other so I'm surprised he even knew my full name. We were playing a drinking game there where we each took it in turn to ask everyone else a question and they had to answer it truthfully or do a dare, and when I was asking my question I noticed him grinning at me constantly, but I was a bit shy so didn't smile back and looked at one of my other friends, and weirdly he seemed a bit annoyed by that and wouldn't even look back at me when he answered my question.I think he's pretty cute, but I'm not sure whether to take it any further as he's a couple of years older than me and he seems to be one of those guys who's nice but a bit of a player. Whenever his Facebook photos come up on my news feed half the time they're of of him with loads of girls and his guy friends are commenting "lad" or something. He's one of those popular guys who could have most of the girls he wanted, although he's also a bit geeky as are all the women who hit on him (he seems to have a couple of close female friends who constantly flirt with him). He's always smiling at me and he's generally quite nice, but he seems like such a player I'm not sure if he just wants me because I'm the girl he can't have (I'm polite but I don't really flirt back, I put a lot of effort into my appearance though I'm not stuck-up, we're in different friend groups and I'm that girl who does loads of things and is always busy.)Advice? :)
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broke up, christmas, facebook, flirt, player, shy, university Reply to this Question
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female
reader, oldbag +, writes (18 March 2013):
 HiI am surprised a girl like you would even notice him, or bother what he's thinking,so am guessing it's you who is interested in him.Look if he's a player he won't be shy around girls,so there's no reason he wouldn't simply make a move if he wanted to.If *you* like him,want to get to know him,show it, but remember he *is* a player
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (18 March 2013):
 I'd say he likes the look of you, but does that mean he likes you enough to ask you out? Why not mime "call me!" with your thumb and pinkie finger extended like you are holding a phone to your ear, the next time you catch him blatantly staring at you.
Look, your description of him as a player type guy with loads of women hitting on him suggests he knows how to ask someone out, and isn't shy about it. If you want to get to know him better, talk to him. Start a conversation on Facebook about something you shared an interest in.
Why would a polite attractive girl with loads of friends and interest want to date a geeky player, anyway, just out of curiosity? You like his looks but don't really know him.
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A
female
reader, malvern +, writes (18 March 2013):
 It seems to me, from everything you say about this guy, that he's used to girls fancying him or possibly throwing themselves at him. I think he's intrigued that you don't do this and he's rather enjoying the thrill of it all. It's the thrill of the chase like the cat watching the bird before it pounces. Just keep things exactly as they are. If he really wants you he'll eventually do his best to get you.
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