A
female
age
26-29,
*maranthe
writes:So, I have a guy friend. I'm 18, he's 21.We've been aware of eachother's existence since we were both 13? But we didn't start becoming friends until I was about 16 nearly 17. We are quite good friends now.Me and him sometimes go do work together and we go off in his van, and while we are alone, he is playful, teases, even acts a little rude, and he is just so nice. But, he's not like that when other people are around. He shuts off. It's like I don't even exist most of the time...He kinda says hi or hi how are you? then walks off. He is just emotionless. That really bugs me.I really do love him I think, but he's driving me insane. I can't even talk to my friends about it because they are all convinced he's in love with one of my best friends, but he told me quite specifically, "I do NOT fancy ....." and he's reiterated that a few times to me. I don't know what to think. Sometimes i catch him looking at me, and I sense something in the stares, but other times, nothing.What am I meant to think?!
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2013): In her post she says the following:
"I really do love him I think, but he's driving me insane."
If he isn't interested in being together; that means he doesn't like her enough to go against his plans. As I said, he's old enough to let her know. She has to be mature enough to move on and not waste her time wondering. Why bother if it isn't going to happen?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2013): WiseOwl -
What if this chick isn't bothered about dating him?
What if she just wants to know if he's interested in her even if they can't be together?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2013): Here's your answer:
"And also, he's told me and made it clear to others he has no interest in dating anyone at the moment because he has things he wants to do in life within the next few years that he couldn't do if he was tied down."
Read this. Your crush is making you read things into his every action. He isn't interested in dating anyone. So try to control your imagination; so your feelings don't get hurt.
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A
female
reader, Amaranthe +, writes (10 July 2013):
Amaranthe is verified as being by the original poster of the questionJust thought i'd add, the friend of mine who everyone thought he fancied, he is playful with her regardless of who is around. So why can't he be like that with me?
And also, he's told me and made it clear to others he has no interest in dating anyone at the moment because he has things he wants to do in life within the next few years that he couldn't do if he was tied down in any way so he is remaining single. But that doesn't mean he won't have crushes either..
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2013): First off, if you're 18 and he's 21, he's three years older. You couldn't have been "13" at the same time.
He is only being playful with you, and hasn't done anything more than that. You're crushing on him, and he knows it. So he has fun with you; because he knows how much you like him. That's it. He is flattered that you find him so attractive and that you really like him so much.
He is old enough to know what he wants. He's no longer a teenage boy; so he kids around with you. He is looking for someone closer to his age. If he had a real interest in you romantically; he doesn't have to hide it. He just acts more his age when around other people. He can be a little boyish alone with you.
Don't get yourself all caught-up in a crush. It doesn't take a guy too long to let a girl know that he is interested in her. He will not hide the fact. He doesn't want anyone to think you're together. You're not.
If you have to keep wondering; then he isn't as interested as you want him to be. He likes you as a friend. If you don't believe my answer; just ask him.
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