A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:At the begining of the summer holidays I did something reallllyy stupid that made my family very very angry. They told me I was grounded for life. I didn't think they were serious and were just saying it 'cause they were angry, but now I think they were being serious. I'm not allowed out at all anymore because they don't feel that they can trust me and I don't know what to do to get them to trust me again. Please help.I have leant my lesson, I told them that, but they don't believe me. How can I convince them that I am telling the truth?Help. :/ Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2009): I'm assuming you were cautioned by the police for this event and your parents had to be present? If so, they're probably feeling most embarassed that they had to suffer the humiliation of having to go down to the local cop shop under such circumstances.Of course they're very angry with you. Any responsible parent would be. This is one of those things that has to be taken one step at a time. OK, so you've been grounded. Believe it or not this is an opportunity. I don't know if you're still at school or college, but instead of pining to go out, get your head stuck into your books. Whenever possible, help around the house. Get the vacuum cleaner out. Tidy up any mess. Take some weight off your mother's shoulders. Get the lawnmower out and cut the grass. Pull out a few weeds from the driveway. Occupy your mind with things other than what you're being forbidden to do.Grounded 'for life' is probably what your parents would like at the moment because they're still incandescent with anger at what you did, but of course that's totally impracticable and isn't going to happen. However, while you're under their roof you must abide by their rules and wishes.You have to earn their trust once more, and just saying that you've learnt your lesson isn't going to cut the mustard. To their ears all this means is that you're sorry you got caught. Actions speak a lot louder than words. They don't want you going out again in case you get in with the wrong crowd and do something stupid again. Once they see you're acting in a responsible manner they might bend a little.However, whatever you do, don't feel tempted to sneak out of your bedroom window late at night by climbing down a knotted rope which is attached to the foot of your bed because that would put your cause back 10 years at a stroke if you were caught.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2009): http://teenadvice.about.com/library/weekly/qanda/bltrust.htmIf you will copy and paste this link into your browser, here is a very good article on lost trust with your parents.I wish you all the best.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI was caught shoplifting.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2009): I think I need to have some idea of what you did before offering anything constructive. Please do tell.
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