A
female
age
30-35,
*monation96
writes:hey i am 16 and i have a few questions about sex...what is it like?????? does it hurt???? what is lube??? can he hurt me down there?????? what can get me in the mood???? how can i get an orgasam??? what does it mean to come??? plz help me out here i am going to have sex on oct.31 plz help n give me information
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009): All these people seem to answer your question pretty much, so I guess I'll just go with telling a story. Haha. Well.. my first time was two days ago. I'm 18. When me and my boyfriend did it, he eased into it. He wasn't a virgin by the way. Like.. first he fingered me. Ended up making it a little wet down there. Umm. Then he just rubbed up against my vag with his penis. Just on the outside. Then he started putting it in. Only the head tho. And then after a little bit of 'in and out', he put about a quarter in. A little bit of 'in and out' again. Then he pulled it out and went with fingering again. And of course, kissing and making out the whole time. I'll admit that his penis didn't feel uncomfortable at all [he's average size] I think it might've been his method. But anyway.. Then he put his penis in again, and started using about half of it ['in and out'.. you get my point]. After a bit, he says, "here we go.." and he pushed his whole penis in, and then pulled it out. He looked at me to see how I was doing, and all this time, I'm thinking, "How come it didn't hurt like people said it does..?"After talking with a friend of mine, he told me that sometimes when females reach a certain age, you no longer have anything in there to tear. Maybe you tore it doing sports or using tampons, I don't know. Maybe you never had anything to tear in the first place.Anyways, I don't think I answered your questions. But I hope that a personal story might be of interest.
A
female
reader, Lola1  +, writes (2 October 2009):
 My first time hurt a lot. Don't expect an orgasm the first time. You may need to practice on yourself a lot before you can have that with someone else.
Bring your own condoms and accept no excuse for not wearing them.
I'd suggest you reconsider, but I know you won't.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2009): hi there, i see your 16/17, where im from it is legal to be sexually active at that age, im not sure about the law from the usa.
Right im not going to critisize (much), but i will answer your questions. (since your not asking if its right, you just want to know what sex involves)
Your first time, will im afraid be uncomfortable. it always is, and there is every chance your going to bleed , its not alot, could be anything from spotting, to a very light period those few days after penetration (sex).
My first time, didnt hurt loads, but like i said, it just felt uncomfortable. You will need to tell him to take it easy and not to thrust himself too fast, take his time.
The second time you have sex, you will find its more an enjoyable experience, it wont hurt and it will feel really pleasurable. bear that in mind, on your first time, just because it hurts once, doesnt mean it will forever!!!!
Sex is also about exploring yourself, feeling what you like, for some , clitoral stimulation is a much better feeling than intercourse. thats completely normal.
When your on your own, like in the bath or something, just try masterbating, see what you like, have a feel. that is normal too.
Many things can get you in the mood for sex, anything from kissing to foreplay (masterbation and feeling of the body/tickling/touching/licking).
Or you could just turned on by the sight of your boyfriends naked body. soft music, and passionate kissing is the way forward though i think.
Lube (lubrication) is an ointment that can be applied to the penis or inside the vagina to make sex less dry. as your first time, your unlikly to come.
Ok so when you come, its basically , the female version of sperm, is the best i can put it lol. Its bodily fluids that are released lightly as you get turned on , and then alot more as you orgasm.
To orgasm, is to climax, which means as your having sex, or masterbating and you get those feelings, the more turned on you get, and then you climax.
But dont expect that on your first time, maybe second or third. it can take some people alot of practise before they get it right in order to climax. so dont worry if you dont.
I can guarentee its going to be a lumpy and bumpy ride to begin with, but like i say that wont be forever, its just those first times, til u get used to it.
I will strongly advise practising SAFE sex! use a condom, to prevent pregnancy and especially STD'S!
I would enquire about going on the pill too, but still always use a condom! The last thing you want is to either end up with a baby at your age or worse, gonhoreah, chlamidia, hiv, aids, crabs, the list goes on! be SAFE!
Good luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2009): This is a conversation that you should be having with your mother. Tell her what you are planning to do so that she can get you proper birth control.
I personally think you are way too young to be having sex, as you know nothing about what you are getting yourself into.
I don't think it is the responsibility of anonymous people to educate you about first time sex. You should talk to the people who raised you and taught you their values, we don't know what kind of family you are from or what your personal values are....nor what the reason is that you want to give your virginity away to a "boyfriend" at 16.
If you don't feel comfortable talking to your mom, and I don't know why you wouldn't, after all I think she would be flattered and proud that you came to her about this important issue. Go to a Planned Parenthood office in your area and get educated on birth control options.
Frankly, You need to be on the birth control pill and it takes about a full month of that to be effective against pregnancy.
Then there is the possibility that you could contract the HPV virus that leads to cervical cancer. Condoms do NOT protect against this virus and there are 43 varieties of it and it is one of the most common human viruses there is. The fact that you will be having sex at a youthful age puts you in the high risk status simply due to your age, not the number of partners or the number of times you had sex.
I know a 19 year old girl who was diagnosed with cervical cancer and she had only had sex twice before.
You are right to be concerned, but ask your questions of your parents and doctors, not people on here who will give you the mechanics. Sex is more than "will it hurt", etc.
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