A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need help, there is a girl at work that I really like, I have worked with her for a few years now but over the past month or so we have been texting like everyday. I eventually asked her out and she basically said that it would be nice but she doesn't want things to get awkward between us at work and that people in our office like a good gossip and she doesn't want to be the talking point. So after a few days she is still texting me alot and last night I was out with my mates and she asked if my mates asked who im texting and I said yes. She then said what did you say. I then said I told them it was just someone at work, she then replied with is that all I am then, just someone. Which I then put, well thats up to you, i've already asked you out and she said, i've already given you an answer hun. I really need help on this as I really like this girl and want to be in a relationship with her but I don't want to mess things up.
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at work, girl at work, mixed messages, text Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2011): Thanks for your advice Dr Psych. But I don't think its like that at all as she knew where I was, I was only round a mates house, not up town like so she knew I wouldn't have been around other ladies. She also isn't a girl who goes out that much and when she does she won't really chat to guys unless she knows them well and she doesn't exactly get much male attention.
A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (9 April 2011):
 Girl from work likes her job. She may like you a bit, but she likes her job more. She likes the fact that you like her...it is an ego boost! She likes to get reassurance of that fact by texting you when you are out. She does this as part of a little game - when you are out then you might be chatting to other ladies...she wants to be the focus of your attention. She maybe bored out with her mates and not getting so much attention from other men that she forgets about you (but she would forget about you if someone else has her attention). She doesn't want a relationship with you, and she has made that clear. She does want to keep you dangling (not nice). In many ways it would be wise to avoid her. If you did get into something with her and it doesn't work out then you both have to see each other during work-time. Plenty of other less complicated girl's in the world...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2011): Well she clearly likes you but is just unsure. You could try doing something sweet. Maybe if you buy her some flowers with a note on or instead of asking her out just ask if she might wanna grab done lunch or something. Or you could just tell her how much you like her. I'll agree there is totally mixed messages.Hope this helps.
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