A
male
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:My name is Seath. I have been dating the same girl since we were 16 and now we are in college. We had a scary moment last month where we thought she might be pregnant even thought we were using birth control. I asked her to marry me and even got her a very small ring which was all I could afford. She said yes and I was scared but happy both. She cried happy tears at the time. Now we find out she is not pregnant on a false alarm which is good I guess since we did not have our act together and were not ready for a kid just yet even though we want to make babies some day when we are out of school and ready. But part of me still wants to marry her even though she is not pregnant and we don’t have to get married now. How can I tell her I still mean it and want to at least stay engaged even if we don’t get married for a little bit more. She said I got points for proposing but now I am off the hook. I don’t want to be off the hook. The whole thing made me realize I want to love her and protect her and be with her no matter what. Am I being dumb? I am going to feel so foolish if I tell her and she is not wanting to stay engaged but I keep thinking about wanting to be her husband now. Thank you for advising me.
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male
reader, kenny  +, writes (16 August 2023):
 All things happen for a reason, this just means at this stage in your life was not the right time.
You are still both very young, its all about communication really, for you both sit down and discuss what you both want and what the future holds for both of you.
There is no rush to get married, plenty of time for that, have a lenthy engagement and enjoy some quality time together before you tie the knot.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (16 August 2023):
 OP, you are both SO young.
You two can decide to have a LENGHTLY engagement. You don't HAVE to marry asap.
Talk to her, tell her you still want to marry her at some point, but if she prefers you two can stay engaged until you are done with college and in a better financial place to actually marry.
And from now on... PRACTISE extra safe sex, so condom (every time), AND the pill!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2023): You dodge a bullet. Count your blessings. If you want to marry her, propose again but not right now. Let some time pass so it is clear it is not about the pregnancy scare. Let it be a special moment just about how you feel about her. You don't have to wait a long time, but don't link it to what happened.
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