A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:My guy and I are planning on getting married soon. We've been together 3.5 years, lived together for 2... we have a great relationship. He's 26, I'm 22. I really don't think I could find someone who makes me happier, who I think would make a better husband, partner, father. He's thoughtful, consistent, smart, ambitious, strong, funny and a great cook. We still have lots of things to laugh and talk about. We got a puppy together a few months ago (our "proto-child" we call her). That's gone really well and we seemed to raise her right (a good sign for future offspring?)! Sometimes he can bug me - he's a little more introverted than I am, and I'm not quite as touchy-feely as he is. But, we both try to accommodate for each other and for the most part, things work out. When we fight, we don't stay mad for longer than an hour... so I guess you could say we have a good thing going. We agree on things like how many kids we want, we've breezed over things like how to raise them and our life goals. We are compatible, for sure. What can I say? We love each other.I've dating lots of fellas, but kept things pretty physically clean with them. With my fella, it was different... he was the one! I lost my virginity to him and I think that it's really cool that I probably won't be with anyone else in my lifetime. My friends think I'm nuts... one of them is insisting that I sleep with at least 7 people before settling down. I thought she was crazy (still mostly do), but now I'm second guessing myself... is she right? Someday will I go crazy that I missed my opportunity to sow my wild oats? How important is sleeping with other people? I'm really NOT interested, but someday will I be?I'm really excited about making the commitment, I just want to make sure I'm asking myself the right questions before tying the knot. What are things that are important in a marriage, what are unforeseen issues that rise up? I want to make sure that I do this RIGHT and for the right reasons. From those who are married and those who are not, I would love some insight on marriage.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2009): In my experience - and pretty much all the girls I've tlaked to agree - sex that is just a physical act is not gratifying or comparable to sex within a loving relationship. I definitely think your friend who told you you need to sleep with 7 people is crazy, or at least is giving you bad advice. Why do you need to have 6 mediocre to bad sexual encounters to be ready to have one amazing lifelong one. and it sounds like you have a good one. It's also incredibly simplistic to assume there's a magic number like 7 that applies for everyone. you know in your heart how you feel about this relationship so listen to yourself and what YOU need. and if you find you have doubts it may be smart to wait a little longer before you finalize your commitment by getting married.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (22 January 2009):
 Sleeping around is not all that it's cracked up to be. You sound very grounded and I think you are very lucky to have found your right man. However if you are not 100% sure about marriage than you should just hold off until you get there. No marriage is perfect but if you guys are in agreement on the big issues then that's half the battle. Listen to your heart NOT your friends. Best of luck!
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