A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I was with my ex boyfriend for 2 years, we split up 5 months ago and i didn't know how i was going to live without him. We ended things really badly and he had been treating me like dirt for as long as i could remember, he didn't even want to see me and when he did it was such a chore for him. he made me feel so unloved and unwanted, was constantly accusing me of being with other men etc even though i gave him no reason to doubt me - i even began to think he was cheating but now know he wasn't. At the start we were the perfect couple, it was love at first sight and we both felt on cloud nine. i've had a few long term relationships despite being young and he was the only one who made me have butterflies, i didn't ever want him to leave my side and couldn't imagine life without us together. we both loved each other even though it appeared differently, we went through so much in such a short space of time that we ended up falling apart. I chased and chased after him for about a month after - ended up being really stalkerish - would turn up at his house and call him hundreds of times a day despite him telling him he no longer loved me and that i had to move on.I felt my world had crashed down. I had a month already pre booked off of work so decided to escape to see my friend in Spain. I had such an awesome summer and it really opened my eyes up as to what life could really be like. No longer was i sat in front of the tele or computer night after night, i was having a social life. I thought about him but not to the extent i had been and felt that i was moving on. After two and half weeks i went home - only to bump into him hours later! he was in our local super market (neither of us ever shop there) and he stopped near me and made conversation, bit arkward as he was with his mum. i can honestly say there was no chemistry and that i didn't feel anything but when i got home i started analysing everything again. I then went away again - friends had invited me, i wasn't escaping this time. I wanted to see him when i got back for the reason that he'd been in my life for so long and i was interested in what he was doing - no longer was i thinking of us together as an item, i accepted we were never going to be together. another month later he kept putting me off - then began to realise that when he said he was going to see me it was probably him just saying it so that i wouldn't keep pestering him.We met up last saturday and chemistry was aboutsolutely out of this world, we're still i love as ever. we've decided to make another go of things. am i making a mistake?
View related questions:
move on, my ex, split up, unloved Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (12 October 2010):
 well it sounds like he didnt treat you very well at the end of your last relationship so why do you think things are going to be different this time around? He obviously didnt trust you when he was accusing you of cheating, and am afraid if he is not going to trust you then there is no basis for a relationship.
However if you think he can change then you need to set a few ground rules before you both get serious again, tell him that he needs to treat you better and be less clingy and always accusing you of cheating, tell him everything he done that you didnt like at that he needs to work on fixing this if you are going to have a happy relationship together.
|
