A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, well the thing is typical friends with benefits story... i was seeing a guy for sex and we have both fallen for each other. Well at least I think. I've known this guy for 6 months we slept together for the first time 3 months ago and since then we have been together. We act like a complete couple and do couple things all the time we also talk constantly like all day. I have met his family and he has met mines. It was fine until he told me he doesn't want me seeing other guys and he doesn't like it when i " use " him for sex but heres the thing.. He doesn't want a girlfriend... I actually love him and want to be with him. He says he has commitment issues and we have spoken about being a couple a few times but he doesn't want me as a girlfriend yet. Will he ever change or should I leave this? He says he doesn't want to stop seeing me but I really want to be his girlfriend. Should I give him until after Christmas to see if he's ready for a girlfriend or just end it? I believe that if hes not ready now he never will be or is that just me being silly? please help me!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2011): You are actually a couple in all but name. You are not FWB. Basically, he just doesn't want to classify you as a girlfriend. Wake up to this - he has three choices - 1) you are a couple or 2) be FWB in the true sense or 3) it's finished. Actually, option 2 is out of the question because you love him. So he must decide or even better you decide for him. Be in the driving seat and don't wait for him to make up his mind.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2011): This is spooky this sounds just like a question I posted a few weeks ago I'm in exactly the same situation he doesn't want me seeing anyone I found that out cos I told him I had a date but he doesn't want me as his girlfriend just yet I asked him he said he does want to be with me properly just not yet but I'm gonna be honest why do these men think we are gonna wait around for them we deserve better than that and while we are waiting for them to change there mind about us we could be meeting the man of our dreams my patience is starting to run out with him now
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A
female
reader, Lexie88  +, writes (6 December 2011):
 You should leave him alone and find someone who is proud to call you his girlfriend.
Committment issues? That's a load of BS! You just watch, when a girl he really wants comes on the scene he'll suddenly forget his committment issues.
I believe that if hes not ready now he never will be or is that just me being silly? No you're not being silly, this is what's happening.
I think you know what's going on and I think you have the strength to just walk away. Don't be that girl that a guy uses to sleep with, to talk to and to have the company of, without being committed to.
Everytime you do girlfriend like things with a guy who's not your boyfriend, you'll get screwed over (no pun intended).
Let him go.
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