A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Why I get along well with my female friends for years but not in relationship? Why the same spark in relationship ends quickly and negative things get bigger and bigger? Why I talk to my female friends for hours and hours on Internet, phone and in person but in relationship my partner gets bored of me? Something could be wrong with me or they don't understand that what kind of person I'm ? I simply love talking to people and will I ever find someone who will not get bored of me like me female friends? Please have your thoughts on this issue I have been confronting for years. Thanks !
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2013): Do you think you allow enugh time for the relationships to turn into something. For many ppl friendships will always be easy.How long have you know your friends? YOu have probably known some of your female friends for more than a year. Stop putting any pressure on yourself. The old adage
just go out and have fun is still true. Just enjoy each others company & things will happen in time.
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (25 October 2013):
Actually, I have a great bit of advice for you:
You said that you have many platonic female friends, right? The people you should be asking is THEM.
You remind me of a really close platonic friend of mine who asked my advice regarding the exact same thing but specifically to his seeking out women on dating sites. My advice to him was that with the exception of anything overly personal, that I could see some of his past correspondence to relationships he had started and had fizzled like you describe. He showed me a couple of conversations and emails, and I knew the problem within 3 seconds. In his case, he got clingy and kept indirectly and directly seeking reassurance that she was interested or liked him. Once I told him what I saw, it was like his eyes were opened. since then, he's now in year 4 of his long term relationship, and she is amazing. Did I mention he's wheelchair bound with muscular dystrophy?
Talk to your female friends and get their advice! When they tell you this advice, don't get all defensive and try to argue with them. They are your best ticket to see something that maybe you're missing!
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