A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm 23 years old, soon to be 24. I have just finished university. I don't think Im THAT bad looking, but for some reason I seem to still be a virgin. I know that I"m supposed to wait for the right person and all this, but I fear that there is no right girl or anybody out there for me. I am trying to figure out what's wrong with me.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2007): I'm sure there is nothing wrong with you, you probably just haven't found the girl you're comfortable with yet. I'm about the same age as you, virgin also, and often wondered why I didn't have a boyfriend, I was so lonely, turning up to parties and functions alone, spending friday nights by myself, etc etc but I realised I was doing it to myself. I was expecting my knight in shining armour to fall into my outstretched arms. I now know, that is soooo not going to happen. I've gotta go looking for him, and you've gotta go looking for your girl, too. These things just seem to happen a little later for some people. That's all. In the meantime, go on a few dates if you can. You might be surprised, a girl you might not have given a second glance to before might turn out to be someone you find irresistible once you get to know her. Give it a try :) All the Best.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2007): I'm in the same situation as yourself - i'm soon to be 21 and will be going to uni and I have NEVER had a real boyfriend or a real kiss, and noone seems attracted to me in the slightest. I guess it just takes time for some of us. Just look to the future, I'm feeling a little hopeful ;)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2007): Hi, I'm not sure whether you are worried that you are a virgin, or worried that you won't find the right person for you. These are two separate issues.
However, if either of these things is bothering you, then DO something about it. The right woman won't just arrive one day and ask you for sex -you have to go looking for her!
If it is just that you want to have sex - I'd ask yourself why that it so important to you? (It is good but it isn't everything - well I am a married woman of 31 and that is how it seems to me!)
The answer to both your worries could be to date a few girls and see how it goes - maybe they'll want to have sex and maybe one of them will be Miss Right. What you need then is dating advice- you could get that by posting another question on this site!
You mention that you've just finished Uni - maybe this change in your life is an opportunity to move on and break away slightly from your old image - i.e. if you have always been shy, be a bit more outgoing. Join some clubs and play sports and meet girls as friends first - once you start building friendships, love and / or sex are more likely to follow...
good luck
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A
male
reader, Thomas17  +, writes (18 February 2007):
 yup doc is right. enjoy life, take things slowly and enjoy life. your missus right will come when it is right :)
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A
male
reader, Dr. John  +, writes (18 February 2007):
 There is nothing at all wrong with keeping your virginity until you are married.
I tend to think your partents may have tried to instill proper morals within you and you may subconciously trying to keep those morals. In that case you may not be trying as hard as someone without decent morals to "get all the girls you can". But in that case also you are avoiding all the heartache of many sexual relationships and all the sexually transmitted diseases as well.
You will do well not to worry so much about this and focus more on someone you want to spend the rest of your life with. The rewards are great. Doc.
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