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female
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*eality
writes: I met this guy when I was 18 and immediately fell in love with him and everything was good the 1st year but then he started to cheat and we eventually broke up but he continued to come in and out of my life I found out that he had got married but I continued to sleep with him without ever confronting him I even went as far as faking a pregnancy to keep him but it didn't work and I haven't heard from him now for 2yrs I am now 24yrs old and still in love with this man I am afraid to be with anyone else because he was my 1st and only sex partner and I don't have any desire for anyone else. I have not been in a relationship or gone on a date with anyone since him. I want to find someone who can love me the way I love him but it's hard when I can't get him off my mind I am tired of being alone why is it so hard for me to be happy? Why do I love someone who doesn't love me? And why won't the pain go away?
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female
reader, chezza10 +, writes (5 July 2006):
I want to be able to not let the thoughts of a past marriage and 4 year relationship be on my my and influence my emotions so that i can be as god as i can for another person if i have another partner
A
male
reader, Gryphon +, writes (23 April 2006):
 I second bridget’s post, but just want to add that sex, while a strong bind, is not the be-all end-all of relationship ties. He has abused you and as bridget said, you must look into your heart and recognize him for what he is and tell yourself you must move on. The only way you will become happy is if you see him for the cheating loser he is and decide to have nothing more to do with him and the emotional stranglehold he has on you. I can’t say it won’t be tough, but isn’t finding your happiness again worth it? Best of luck…
~Jake~
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A
female
reader, bridget +, writes (22 April 2006):
 Hey there reality..
The pain wont go away because you wont let it...
You are still holding onto this relationship and also I sense that you are blaming yourself aswell.. You need to give yourself some time to heal and move on and you are not doing this..
You obviously had very strong feeling for this guy when you admitted that you "faked a pregnancy" so you could keep him.. I think that its best for everyone in this situation if you move on and believe me, Time is a great healer you just have to let it heal..
Holding onto this guy after all he has done to you is bringing you guilt and bad memoeries and you need to learn to just let him go..
There is nothing to be afraid of by being with someone else, I understand it is asking alot to leave him after him being you first sexual partner, but you have to see that he abused this trust of yours...
He is not worthy of your trust and honesty and love, but someone out there is, and that should be your focus..
Best Wishes
Jacqueline
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