A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay so. I have this infatuation with my woman ex-teacher. I am a bisexual, and I'm only in middle school. I'm in 8th grade, and I had her in 6th grade. She's amazing to me, she isn't very good looking, but I think she's beautiful. Anyway, I always am looking for her. I look for her when I walk to my bus, when I walk in the hallways, etc. I even dress nicely so that if I happen to bump into her, I will be presented nicely. I signed up for a class and only did it to be with her, as it's the class she's doing. It's only for 15 minutes though... but it's definitely worth it. I went to her classroom today because I owed her a paper. I was really anxious about it last night and this morning, it was like a big event was happening. I dressed nicely, did my makeup wonderfully, and went above and beyond JUST because I was going to her classroom for less than a minute. That's how important she is to me. I used to think I saw her just as a role model and somebody I looked up to, but I find myself a little sexually attracted to her recently. Sometimes I will look her up on social networking sites, just so I can see a picture of her. I found a blog that she had for her son, but now it's off limits to people she hasn't invited. I'm even scared to write this because I worry that maybe she'll see this and find out about my infatuation, but I honestly have gone through so much suffering about this that it really doesn't matter to me anymore. I hope I can have that class with her. I made my binder look really nice so that she would be impressed by it. Sometimes when I want to look good or am really lazy, I think to myself "Well, what if you saw her?" And that gets me up and ready to go. I also have started having a little bit of a crush on a student teacher from another classroom, and I don't even have her for a class. She stands outside of the classroom everyday right near my locker, and she is always watching me and my friend. Whenever I turn around to look at her, she's watching me. But I don't worry about it, honestly. It's a good thing. :) But anyways, I always tend to do the same with her, and I know she won't be here for long as she's just a student teacher... and that will make me REALLY sad when she's gone. Because I don't see the first teacher I like as much, and so she's kind of a fix to it.Back to the first teacher... she used to come out to the bus area every day, and I would be so happy. I would always look for her when she was out there. But she doesn't come out there anymore, and that makes me sad. :/ I've looked up her name in the phone book and stuff, but nothing comes up. I've decided it's not worth it. But I'm still in love with her...And the second teacher.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2008): I think that you have developed this crush because you admire this teacher. I dont think that you are in love with her, you are just infatuated with her. You need to spend more time with people your own age and sexual orientation.
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