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male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi,I have been dating my gf for close to 2 yrs. We used to have great sex in the beginning but because of certain issues we stopped for a while. Which was fine. However it has been 11 months since we last had sex and now I feel more like shes my friend then my gf. When I ask her if she would like to go to a hotel room she refuses claiming its "dirty" (before we sex at a place we can no longer access). Just bringing up the sex issues gets her mad because she says i should love her without sex.Now I do love my gf very much but the strain of non-sexual acts all the time leaves my relationship feeling like its just a rlly good friendship. She is never exicted to see me as much as she used to and she hardly does anything sexual (that includes deep kisses). The only time she does is if I initiate it. Shes a great person but I just dont feel as happy. I feel as though she doesnt find me attractive. Now im not a bad looking guy, when I was single I had more then my share of girls flirting with me. But i feel as though on a scale of ten, ten being the highest her lust to be with me is 0.001/10.In the begining she was different and happier to be with me both sexual and not. Now I barely see her once a week and she doesnt even seem to mind while I think of seeing her every 2 min. Like i said she feels far more like a best friend then a gf or lover. What do i tell her? How can i make her understand? I feel so helpless because everytime i try to talk to her she gets angry at me. What should i say to her??
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2009): I think that you should possibly consider taking a break from her and seeing if she is really what you want in a relationship. I know it can be hard to do something like this when you've been in the relationship so long, but it may be the only way to find out if your relationship is what you want. Talk to her and tell her you want to take a break to find out what you really want. Being away from her will help you think and find out how you really feel. It cant hurt to try.
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