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female
,
anonymous
writes: ive split up with my boyfriend and feel really guilty what should i do?
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (8 June 2006):
 Ask yourself why you feel guilty? Is it just because things didn't work out and his feelings are hurt too? Or is it because you were nasty about breaking up? Or something else?
If you were as kind to him when breaking up as you'd want someone to be when doing the same with you, then you have nothing to feel guilty about. Relationships rarely last forever; that's why good ones are so special.
If you were unpleasant about breaking up with him and you're guilty over that, then it wouldn't be out of line to write him a note -NOT a text- and say that you're sorry you hurt him, and that you didn't mean to be mean, but (insert reason here) and you needed to get out of the relationship.
Other than that, there's no reason for guilt.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2006): Dear, it's one thing to feel sad that a relationship has broken up but try to drop the guilt and angst. All love relationships are risks and the mark of maturity is understanding that risk and realizing that one can be dumped. You took the risk...your bf took the risk. You have nothing to feel guilty about. Relationships bust up all the time and people just face the loss and move on. If he is taking the 'rejection' hard, then he just has to work through it and realize that your rejection of him will eventually open up new and wonderful opportunities for him to go forward and find someone better suited to him. He will get there. So stop feeling the guilt...it does show you have compassion but too much of it is not healthy because it's a worthless emotion, when nothing can be done about it. Stop wasting all of your emotional energy. So be strong, accept that it happened..don't allow anyone to make you feel guilty..this is life and people learn from their sad experiences. You bf will do this. Just move ahead and find happiness in all you endeavor to do, in the future.
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A
female
reader, matron +, writes (8 June 2006):
 Hi, if thats what you want please dont feel guilty, you split for a reason dont go back out of guilt, that would be an even bigger mistake, no-one wants to feel like a charity case. Try to remain friends but get on with what ever you want to do with your life and eventually your b/f will move on with his.Good luck x
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A
female
reader, auntie claire +, writes (8 June 2006):
 dear reader you need to find out why your feeling guilty go over in your head every thing you have been through together write down all the good things about him and also the bad but remember men have feelings too don't mess with his head you could get more hurt then him if it doesn't turn out how you expected. you obviously split for a reason see if it can be worked through talk to him but most of all be honest tell him exactly what you want from him and ask he does the same hope it works out take care xxx
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A
female
reader, sibaan +, writes (8 June 2006):
 follow your heart. if there are no reasons why you two should be apart, then what are you waiting for??
get him back before its to late...
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