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male
,
anonymous
writes: I have two problems: the first being I really like this girl but I'm rubbish at talking to girls, so have you got any good tips? Have you got any good tips for asking people out and flirting with them?
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male
reader, lboy  +, writes (25 May 2006):
 well i can't say this will work bu8t it's what she'll be looking for, when you go to talk to her then just listen to what she has to say and talk back, just be yourself act natural and let what happens happen, ok yes she might turn you down but you'll never get the girl unless you try.
A
male
reader, lboy +, writes (25 May 2006):
well i can't say this will work but it's what she'll be looking for, when you go to talk to her then just listen to what she has to say and talk back, just be yourself act natural and let what happens happen, ok yes she might turn you down but you'll never get the girl unless you try./
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A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (24 May 2006):
 There's one main "tip" that will help you talk to girls for all of your life:
**** Girls are people without penises ****
If you want to talk to a girl, you talk to her the same way you'd talk to a friend, or your cousin, or a guy at the train station. Girls are human, just like you.
"Hey, are you reading The Da Vinci Code too..? What part are you up to?"
"Is that a West Highland White Terrier? You know, my dad had one of those. What a great dog..."
"Hi, my name's James. I sit behind you in History. Can you believe Mr Wales knocked over his computer during the lecture?"
"I saw you give your speech yesterday. You really persuaded me..."
These are all perfectly legitimate ways to start talking to women, and if you'll note, there's nothing tricky or flash about them. Most girls and women don't want a "line" anyway; they want to be talked to as people, not as objects. Please disregard any advice you get from your peers about pick-up lines. I'm a female of long standing, and I know what I'm talking about.
Women aren't an alien species, so you only have to think about how you'd want to be approached by a relative stranger. If the roles were reversed, you'd want a person to smile, to be friendly and interested in what you have to say, but not be too overwhelming or unctuous.
Safe and pleasant topics of conversation are anything that you have in common, like friends, activities, studies, projects and the general environment. And a little pause now and then is perfectly OK, so don't worry too much if you feel like you've "run out of things to say". That happens, and you don't have to feel like every minute has to be filled with conversation.
One caveat though, is that you have to watch the girl's reaction. If she looks away, then looks back at you (or better still, smiles at you!), then you're clear to keep talking. If she turns away, or doesn't want to talk, that's your cue that she's not interested. Don't take it personally. Just as not every person on earth can be your close friend, not every girl is going to be interested in you.
You can go a long way by just smiling and asking questions about her interests, too. If she keeps talking -- or at least wants you to keep talking -- then you're doing fine.
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, ShortandSweet? +, writes (24 May 2006):
 Confidence ( act , even if you don't feel!) - courtesy and thoughtfulness, notice something about her, but above all - be genuine! Have faith in yourself - my ultra trendy, cynical daughter has often amazed me by seeing through "handsome" and "charming" and going for the genuine - even if he is slightly nervous! Girls can see through posers! Good luck, luv xxx
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