A
female
age
26-29,
*AdiiSuPahSt4r
writes:I am 13 years old and so far I haven't lost my virginity. I want to be one of the few teens who actually save it but like 2 boys wantsz me 2 lost it to them and I keep saying no and they ask me non stop and some other boys want me to suck their ( you know what ) and they get mad at me when I say no. But I don't see anything bad about waiting until marriage but boys don't seem to get it. What do I do , because I feel like I'm being forced.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2009): Boys, guys, men. They'll never stop trying to get you in the sack. You MUST learn to handle turning them down no matter what they say or do.
Physically forcing you to do something is rape, and anything less than that essentially means that you consented. There is no "He was pushing me and I didn't really want to but I did." That basically still means you consented.
I know this sounds insensitive and maybe downright immoral. But this is realistically the way the law sees it, and this is how the pushy guys will see it, so this is how you must be prepared to handle it too.
But not all guys are like this. So what if you talk to 5 guys in one of your classes and all of them are pushy? That probably still leaves another 25 guys that haven't been pushy so far. Think about which ones you're talking to. If you always wait for guys to make the move on you, then you'll always be dealing with the most forward & aggressive ones when they do assert themselves.
A
female
reader, kissxmexagainx  +, writes (23 April 2009):
 How terrible! These boys want to use you for sex, but you seem to be a responsible young girl. There is NOTHING wrong with waiting. It's a good thing, especially at your age. You should stay away from these boys, not all boys are like this. If they keep bugging you tell an adult that you feel close to right away. Sexual harassment can happen at any age. Good luck dear. You have more respect from the aunts on here than most 13 year old girls on here, trust me.
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A
female
reader, BabyPip.x  +, writes (23 April 2009):
 You should not be forced into anything you don't want to do like this, I really admire you for saying you don't see anything bad in waiting for marriage, these days there's not so many people like that. You have to be really confident in these situations if you don't want to, then say you don't and make it REALLY clear and if they still bug you keep telling them. If they ever try to physically force you or touch you then you really need to inform someone or even report it to the police.
good luck x
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (23 April 2009):
 I'm with Satindesire. TELL someone you trust.
Don't be alone with any of these boy. Or any boy for that matter. You are not ready for sex, and that is a GOOD thing. Don't ever sell yourself short.
If you want to save your virginity for marriage then that is YOUR choice.
Where do you meet all these boy? Where does this bullying happen? At school?
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A
female
reader, loveinidleness  +, writes (23 April 2009):
Sweetie, you ARE being forced. If you don't want it - don't do it, and let me promise you, sucking a penis is not a treat unless you are in a loving and committed relationship. Guys have to PAY women to do it. Ever wondered why?
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A
male
reader, Ronaldron  +, writes (23 April 2009):
dont giv in yourself. those guys you've met are just not the ones that deserves you. A guy who actually likes you will never force you doing tings which you are not comfortable with. I go ot with girls but i never force them into anything. i stand back and giv them room until they feel comfortable..girls i go out with deserves the respect so do you
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A
female
reader, Carrie191204 +, writes (23 April 2009):
I agree tell your parents!!If you were my daughter i would want to know and put an end to this bullying!!!!Tell your mum and dad hun :)
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A
female
reader, kellyxxx +, writes (23 April 2009):
 I would just keep saying no! And say it like you mean it. Tell your parents what is going on, they may be able to help! X
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2009): Sounds to me you have a sound program that works for you. It also looks like you are starting to second guess your self. Don't do that. Be proud of your habit to say no. In doing so, you will build a very gutsy, self-assured, secure, strong woman.
When you say you feel forced, it seems to me you have a great deal of pressure to perform sex acts. Stay out of situations where others have opportunity to pressure you.
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (23 April 2009):
 Keep on saying NO! You dont have to do anything you dont want to do and dont let them force you by being nasty or rude to you. The are immature and irresponsible. I admire you for wanting to keep your virginity until you are married!
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