A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My ex and I dated for 10 months and we both decided that the flame had pretty much burnt out but since have remained the best of friends. We still hung out, called and texted all the time up until a couple weeks ago then found out she's starting to see someone. She has become pretty distant and barely has any time for us. This is really killing me because I feel like I'm losing my best friend and I'm sure I still have feelings as more than friends. Any thoughts on how to deal with getting over this quickly?
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female
reader, chocoholicforever +, writes (14 February 2011):
How about staying busy and work on developing your other friendships, with other people. Your ex naturally will have less time for you now if she has a new romantic relationship in her life. Not only that, but out of respect for her new partner, she has to spend less time with you since you are her ex. It wouldn't be healthy for her new romantic relationship otherwise. Just give her her space, maybe in time when she's more secure in her new relationship she'll feel more comfortable about spending more time on your friendship. just stay busy, hang out with other friends, maybe take up new activities, and give yourself time and you'll start to feel better and think about her less.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2011): I don't think there is any way of getting over it QUICKLY. It's all about slowly moving on. Everything takes time and if you move too quickly you'll find you're in a new relationship for the wrong reasons and that's only going to cause even more heartache.I think making a conscious decision to keep yourself busy and focus your attention towards something else is the first step in healing your hurt. You need to set some goals and create an interest that you can look forward to each week. Start some type of sport, project, weight loss program or whatever the goal or interest you choose. But it's important that you keep busy with your OWN interests. Once you become your OWN confident individual with your OWN interests meeting new people, you will find that you will naturally attract nice people. Eventually you will find yourself interested in someone new and your hurt that your feeling now will hopefully be a thing of the past.She's moving on and you need to do the same and that involves taking action, physically and mentally.Good luck
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