A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:When should I return to facebook? My ex who has been deleted once then re-added (because I thought we were errrr ...friends??) has met someone else, and is in a relationship...facebook has noted this...lol!! I am kinda happy for him... but he was a lil weird with me, when we were nearing the end... yadda yadda!!A friend of mine has a fb account, and has told me his new girlfriend has put her profile pic of them up as her profile pic...he hasn't altered his ...yet...(is this cause I've gone off fb...?I dunno???... He knows I know about them...If I return to fb will he just rub 'salt into the wound'???I don't want to delete him as it would be obv it kinda bothers me? But tbf, i did go off facebook for a while, so maybe he gets that already?What do i do???p.s. (I am not the sort of person who gets with someone else just to make someone jealous...I like my own company and would never stress about being alone.Thanks x
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Spanner28 for your thoughts/advice.There wasn't really any malice, but I never got a good enough reason for the split, just some 'cowardly' excuses/BS! I would just rather someone say they no longer love you, or they've met someone, etc, at least that way you get closure. Lol. I have read your article by the way, very true, very good, could've done with reading that a while back! Ha!I've accepted I'll never get that closure now, (bit like your friends situation), his wanting to remain friends was just a line etc etc. Already seen the tagged picture of him and her, I didn't comment on that though!! So yeah the hard bit is done!! We kept in touch via text, but I also said I'm not gonna text him anymore, don't want cause any problems for him and her (see I am a nice genuine person, not a bitch!)Am still off fb for now, just letting it all sink in really. Have wished them well (I'm really not a horrible person, do hope he's happy, just that I still feel a bit like a failure, I must've been a shit girlfriend etc etc)!! Oh well, shit happens, I'm sure I will get there in the end! :-)Actually I missed fb for a while, but am ok without it at the mo. I will go back when I feel upto seeing/dealing with the shit that gets posted! (He will probably be engaged with a sprog on the way next time I go on!! Lol. I hid his posts before I came off it, but if I feel I can't handle seeing more when/if I go back,or I'm tempted to look at his page, I guess I'll just have to hit delete/block (and then what you don't know can't hurt you can it?)Thanks for your advice x :)
A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (11 January 2012):
 You're very welcome. Life is so much more simple when you haven't the weight of everyone else's opinions sitting on your shoulders.
Best of luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHoneypie, worldlywise, k c100, and Ciar, thankyou for your constructive advice, I shouldn't worry what people think so much! Ciar we were texting, even flirty ones until recently, I have put a stop to that now he's with someone else!
Female anonymous, I disagree, it's not driving me insane, that's way to harsh a description!! I am happy for them, and have wished him well with it, I woouldn't go back there either, we obv aren't right for each other, and i didn't realise there was a time scale for 'moving on' or that It was 'past time I did the same' as you put it...I totally accept it, just didn't want it shoved down my throat, and didn't want to appear childish by deleting him, hence my question. Thanks for your opinion though..
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A
female
reader, Ciar +, writes (9 January 2012):
Deleting him from Facebook is appropriate since you're no longer dating and aren't maintaining a friendship. You're sitting here stressing yourself out about how you look to others and what they might think of you, all for nothing. And you're asuming that you and what you do or don't do will be at the forefront of your ex's mind. He's moved on, time for you too as well.Go ahead and delete him. He probably won't even notice and when he does he won't think twice about it.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (9 January 2012):
 Well surely if you are off Facebook you dont have an account, you will have to open a new one and start the process of adding people all over again? So that way you wont have to delete your ex, you simply just dont add him this time you are setting up your account.
I have recently just got into a new relationship and my ex deleted me as a friend, I personally think it is a little childish but I can understand that he doesnt want to see pictures of me and my new boyfriend which will inevitably appear. So I'm not upset with him - so I'm sure your ex wont mind that you dont re-add him/delete him (whatever it is that is going on).
At the end of the day - you are not teenagers and Facebook is not a big deal. Dont have him on your facebook if you dont want to see pictures of him and his new girlfriend, simple as that. He is old enough to not take Facebook so seriously either, so I'm sure he wont be offended. He has a new girlfriend now anyway so he wont exactly be thinking about you and your Facebook activities will he.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2012): He's moved on but you haven't and it's driving you insane. Delete him so you can start moving on. He did and it's past time you do the same.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2012): Just delete him, block him, whatever, he's history now and its just another part of moving on for you.
He probably won't even notice,or not for months, men worry alot less about who's on FB friends list etc than girls do anyway.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (9 January 2012):
 Honey, get on FB, delete HIM. He won't be upset. If he does ask you why just tell him, it's out of respect for him and his new girl and leave it at that.
Don't fret so much, you two are over, maybe part of moving on (for you) will be to hit that delete button.
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