A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I dated a guy for 4 years, we were so in love but in the end grew apart. It didn't end well and we no longer talk to each other. It has been 15 months since the break up and we both seem to have moved on with our lives, he is seeing someone else and has been for a while, while I have been dating and enjoying the single life for a bit. We share a few mutual friends but one of these has hinted that we should talk and get in touch just to be civil and so we can maybe catch up as a group, this hasn't happened yet but I think we are both moved on. One mutual friend we shared kept in touch with me after the brak up some did not. This one was his old friend who he's known since primary school we are now 26!! We had always got on so I thought nothing of it. A few months ago we started to hang out as friends laughing at each others bad dates etc. A month ago he said he likes me and has done for some time, I said I liked him too bit did not wish to pursue this as it would be too strange as me and my ex don't talk and they are best friends. He seemed cool with it but we flirted much more and ended up sleeping together. I want him to tell my ex as I think he should know but he doesn't want to yet, he wants to see if we get more serious first as he doesn't want to rock the boat with his mate until we get to spend more time together and are sure of what we want...... I'm very confused now as I feel sleeping with him and going on dates was a big deal and I don't want to go "sneaking around".I feel bad enough for seeing an ex's friend as it is something I would never even do so now feel a bit guilty... when I am with him he calms me down assuring me it's fine and I feel ok.... I'm just a bit worried if this guy is as serious as he says he is about me or if I'm over analysing and worrying too much... I know that many of our friends won't approve but more worried of meeting my ex for the first time in over a year saying I'm sleeping with his best mate.
View related questions:
best friend, flirt, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni know what you mean and thanks for that :D...
it just seem like now i've slept with him he seems to have lost a bit of interest and doesn't want to do as much with me and wont take me anywhere aeen as public. i knoe he's self concious about is weight as he is overweight and i know he's a bit shy with getting naked specially since the ex in question is quite athletic.But that doesn't excuse the fact he doen't want to take me out in public...im just feeelin a bit left like now he's slept with me thats it :(
A
female
reader, kayli  +, writes (4 March 2009):
 hi there,
i have been in this possion myself a year of two ago, and as far as telling ur ex about it, i wouldn't .Reason for this is because after being with him for a long time he hasnt made any contact with u trying to be civil mabye because he finds it hard but why should u feel guilty.....yes hes moved on and so should u ! would he feel the same if he was in the same postion ? at the end of the day ur single and so is his friend, the two of u both find an attract towards one another so ur doing nothing wrong ....just so happens that he is ur exs mate but hes also urs. great relationships start from friendship!
So u should feel bad about it i think ur definetly analysing it too much i do the same.... sometimes u just need some else to put it in perspictive for u.
i hope that sort of helped ... want to talk abou it futher email me ... i have a good ear x
...............................
|
