A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Hi there. I am divorced, it was not what I wanted, he did. It has been a year. Our marriage was loveless for several years. The 4 kids are all adults and they struggle with it some. My question is this: What do I do with things like our wedding album. Do I take family pictures off the wall? Do I throw the monogramed champaign glasses out? All the wedding gifts I have everyware. Do I offer them to the kids? I can't imagine them wanting anything that has to do with the marriage. ( We were married 30 years.
View related questions:
divorce, wedding Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your input. I think I will do just what you all said, pack them up in a box and leave them with him to do what he wants. The kids have all refused anything of him. I know that will pass. I hope it will, they need to love their father again. Thank you again. Judy
A
female
reader, lainey23 +, writes (15 September 2010):
 Decide which items are really irreplaceable or important to you and toss the rest. This type of "sorting" is so painful and I feel for you (as I just went through a devastating breakup and had to do this.) Even though it seems as though everything is in shambles now, the fact is that the marriage was a part of your life. You may want to look back on it when things aren't as painful and remember the good times. Pictures and tokens of love can be nice to have for that. However, I would only keep a few of these things and pack them away where you don't have easy access for awhile. If you think your kids might want some things, ask them. Otherwise, throw anything you really don't need away. If any of it belonged to him, send them or toss them. Good luck!
...............................
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (15 September 2010):
 Like Honeypie said, what do you want to do with them? I don't think there is a right or wrong answer. But after you figure out what you think would be best, ask your formed husband about it to see if he feels the same way. Since it is half his stuff as well you can't just throw it out without checking with him first.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (15 September 2010):
 The questions is not what to do, it is what do YOU want to do with them?
Do YOU want to keep them? If not, talk to your kids. If they want any of it let them, if not.. toss them. The memories will always be with you, mementos or not.
If you are unsure, pack them up and see how you feel living without them. At some point it may feel cleansing to toss them.
Good luck
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010): Hi
I would put them in a box and store them. At the time they were special the memories were real but time to start afresh. A new chapter in your life it is never too late.
I hope you are been kind to yourself and doing things that you enjoy, getting out and about joining with friends and making new ones. It must feel sad closing the book but look at each item with fond memories if you pack them away, and get ready to write the next chapter. It was your pathway in life but you now have a new one, have you gone on a nice holiday?
I wish you love and new day's. :)
Spunky monkey.
...............................
A
female
reader, xanthic +, writes (15 September 2010):
 If your children would like something, for whatever reason, give it to them and be done with it. If not, put anything personal like family pictures and anything with your name on it into a box to be put in storage, and sell the rest. There's no reason to keep things that will only remind you of your pain.
...............................
|
