A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Am I doomed to remain single? I have been so for all of my life. no joke. I have never found anyone that I like well enough to get into any sort of relationship with, at least not anyone that I can be with. Anyway, I don't know what's wrong with me. I am too embarrassed to ask any girl out, it is a curse of mine. If I did find a girl that I know I would like, I would overcome the embarrassment, but alas no girl that I know fits into that category. I am around plenty of girls that I find pretty (most of whom I don't know), I just can't bring myself to build up the confidence to ask them out.I need tips and suggestions on how to assert myself and how to let girls know that I am interested in them. one thing is for sure, they certainly haven't been showing any interest in me (not that I'm ugly or an asshole or anything, it's just true)if it helps, I know I'm straight, I am a tall and well built guy (6 foot 4, 260 lbs, a little chunky, I have been described as a "man steak" before), and I am nice to a fault. most of all I am not an asshole, I detest guys who are.if you want more info, please ask I will be happy to give it to you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyou guys are right, I know I will find love in time. I just don't know what to do about myself. I have never (I literally mean never) been in any sort of relationship with a girl past just being friends. It sucks and I am tired of it. I barely have any friends who are girls as it is. I really want to start a relationship with ANY girl, even if it's not that meaningful. I want to learn what is and is not love and I can't do that if I've never had anything to compare it to. I think I know what I want in terms of love, but I don't know what to do if I do fall in love. I want to be able to say for sure that it is not pseudo love caused by attachment to that person. I hope this makes since.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2010): Dude.... relax. You're barely out of your teens, and you're talking about "all of your life." It's a long life, and you're young. You have PLENTY of time to get into a serious relationship.
I'd say the biggest thing holding you back is your attitude. You worry too much! Relax, be yourself, stay confident, and love will find you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2010): At your age I hadn't been with anyone either. Don't worry about it. Time takes care of most things and will help you find your way.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2010): I don't think you're doomed to a life of being single.It could be that because you don't know how to show you're interested the girls around you don't think of you that way, because to them, something beyond friendship had never been an option.I think, for where you are personally, it's all about building the foundations. You seem like the type of guy to be friends with a girl for a while before asking her out, so I'd start there. Just go slow, join in conversations, maybe find a common interest or join a club you know they go to? Offer to help out with coursework if you're still in school. Make friends and let them get to know you, your personality will shine through any shyness and they might like what they see. You may find these girls you don't really know don't check all your boxes because you don't really know them. You said about them not really giving you a chance and they don't even know you, but you seem to be doing the same! Go slow, make friends, and then you may find someone ends up wanting more. You're young, you've got all the time in the world to find love, so for now just enjoy the process :) Good Luck!xxx
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