A
male
age
36-40,
*Alexis_
writes: Basically i have known this guy for about 3 weeks now...we used to text eachother everyday up until we met last thursday for a drink...i went back to his house and left the next morning; amazing night and we both said we felt very relaxed around eachother...we then met again on sunday night for a meal, and i went back to his again as i expected....however this week he has not replied to my texts or voicecalls....i have sent about 6 texts in all and just one voice message on his cell phoneI am worried because on monday i posted up a message on his facebook wall basically saying 'hey...hope u are ok....miss you loads xxxxxxxxxxx' kinda thing. He was also ill so i felt a nice message would make him feel betterHowever 1 hour later the message was deleted...i was very worried indeed.....He has 2 jobs and is in college 2 days a week; yet this has not stopped him from replying in the past.I basically need some advice guys..do you think the facebook message was too much and that why hes being distant...or do y'all think hes just had some fun and wants done with me?I am noyt trying to act desperate or clingy towards him, since i think its the right thing to do to check someone you care about is okay....thanks
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male
reader, Boonridge McPhalify +, writes (12 May 2010):
he is clearly not as into you as he was at first- if someone doesn't answer their phone, ignores your texts and delete's messages you write on their facebooke wall then they are no longer interested.
did you meet via facebook?
as if so he might use it to meet people and your message could have hampered another of his conquests
A
female
reader, mallen318 +, writes (8 May 2010):
ummm ya he had his fun and is most likely done with you if he brought you up to his room after such a small period of time he just wanted to have a nice night not commitment
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A
female
reader, SillyB +, writes (8 May 2010):
'He's just not into you' is a book I picked up and read at a bookstore as I waited 2 hours for a guy who was 'late' for our date. He ended up using me for sex and then dumping within two weeks.
You've been used my dear. I keep my pants up now for at least 3 months when I date someone. I learned from this one mistake and promised myself I wouldn't let it happen again.
Read the book. A GUY IS NEVER TOO SICK, TOO STRESSED, TOO TIRED, TO BUSY, TO ANYTHING to call a girl he really likes. He'll chase you and try to make you his.
He got his sex and thats all he wanted. Now, he might still call back, for more sex, but I recommend not going there. His silence shows just how interested (NOT) he is.
READ the book! Save yourself alot of grief in the future.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (8 May 2010):
About the Facebook message, you should check again if it is really deleted. Sometimes it is the system which did not show your message and later it will appear.
If it is really deleted, it could be that he is cutting you off. Or he is scared of commitments and pulling out.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2010): Im sorry, but I think he may just have been using you. I know its probably not what you want to hear, but perhaps its best you chalk this up to experience and walk away.
You have only known each other for 3 weeks, and met him only twice? To say you miss him probably came across as a bit full on, especially if he only sees it as something casual. Perhaps you made more of the relationship than was actually there?
Alternatively, is he actually "out"? Do all his friends and relatives know? A public declaration like that on facebook possibly wouldnt have gone down well.
OR, he already has a partner, cheated, and doesnt want them to know.
That happened to me. I wrote on my ex-bf's FB when we were "dating", and was told in no uncertain terms that was NOT on, because he had ex GF's as friends and didnt wnat them to know etc etc etc. Turned out he had about 3 or 4 "women" who he had told exactly the same thing to, all completely oblivious to the others, thinking they were all exes!
Just be careful x
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A
female
reader, inkspell101 +, writes (8 May 2010):
i think you should let him go, he seems to think u might be clingy so if he isnt man enough to appreciate your caring attitude, he isnt worth ur time
you can find a better guy any day
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