A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:{Moderator note: edited for grammar, paragraphs, etc.}Ok, this is going to be very long but I want to put it all out there so I can get as much feedback as possible. Basically back in April I met a girl in a chatroom. We talked and then on yahoo and exchanged numbers and things were amazing. The conversations we had on the phone were awesome, we both texted each other and were so interested in each other. We each have the same past, the same morals, saw each other and everything was great. After 3 weeks we both said we loved each other. I knew I meant it when I said it and she did when she meant it. The conversations were still great and I knew I hadn’t ever felt about a girl like this. I was in South Carolina visiting family because I start a full time July 19th. I told her I really wanted to come see her( she is about 5 hours away from where I live) and I told her to tell me a time that is good for her and I will plan my summer around it. She told me a week, which was originally 4 weeks ago and I said ok. And here is where things went the other way and I am completely clueless. She backed out on me when I got back home. All of a sudden it wasn’t a good time for some reason and I understood. Then things started happening. An ex called her back which upset her and she guaranteed me nothing was different and she wanted nothing to be with him and I believe her and still do. But it brought up memories of her past. She all of a sudden wanted to slow down and that was fine with me. But over the last 3 weeks nothing has been the same. I literally had to beg and plan a time to talk to her, if I just called she wouldn’t answer. She never initiated and conversation. She never asked me a question about how my day was or anything like that at all. Like it got to the point to where half her text replies were the word "ok". She said that she wanted to get to know me better and she hasn’t been trying in my opinion. Now all of a sudden she doesn’t trust me. She thinks I am in chatrooms all the time because a friend saw a name similar to the one I used and she accused me when it wasn’t me and I had to beg for a whole day just to show her it wasn’t me. And here is another thing. She claims to be too busy for me to come down and see her. But every weekend she goes out with friends and that is her excuse for being too busy on weekends to talk to me. Like she literally will ignore a text from me a lot now. I will ask well what are you doing tonight and she won’t even tell me. And then two nights ago it finally came to a head. She told me she couldn’t call because she was going out with friends that night. And that night this time I did go into a chatroom for advice. I basically told the story I am telling now looking for advice and why things changed so suddenly. Turns out she got home that night and instead of calling me she got into the chatroom I was in and the next day like accused me of all kinds of stuff being in a chatroom. Now she claims she doesn’t trust me right now and needs space. So I guess here is my question. How can somebody go from wanted to talk to you a lot and wanting to see you to suddenly losing all interest it seems like. She tells me she loves me and that I don’t get it but I mean when somebody never initiates a conversation and you have to beg to talk to them I just don’t know. I would never expect someone to talk to me non-stop but it has been two months and she isn’t open anymore, its like every time I ask her a question about anything she gets upset and now she doesn’t trust me because she saw me in a chatroom where I was in there asking for advice. And yet she goes out with her friends and won’t tell me what she is doing and will ignore texts. And since she said she needed space I agreed but I haven’t heard a single thing in 2 days now but she said she loved me when she got off the phone. Can anyone please give me an idea of what is going on?? I mean I have planned my summer around this girl and I love her and she just expects me to be way to understanding it seems like. If anyone needs anymore detail tell me and I will be happy to explain. But does she really love me and is maybe expected way to much consideration and understanding from my end (about wanting to come see her before I start work and just rarely taking time to talk to me) or am I getting set up to get my heart broken. Thanks
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chat room, ex called, exchanged numbers, her ex, her past, needs space, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2010): Sounds to me like she was never rly that into u just playin it up cuz she didnt want to b alone happens all the time move on n forget her. good luck
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