A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have just started having sex with a new woman I'm seeing - everything was great, and she seemed to be enjoying it, but she didn't seem to have an actual orgasm. I asked her about it later and she said that she doesn't really have one big orgasm, just reaches this sort of place where everything feels really good etc., but it isn't a peak, or a climax. She says she absolutely loves sex and can never get enough... this seems strange to me. Are there people who just don't have orgasms the same way other people do? As in, they don't reach a peak and then come down again, but kind of enjoy something really good but isn't this big climax?It's crossed my mind that maybe she hasn't ever actually had an orgasm before and just doesn't know... am I being arrogant and people really do orgasm differently?
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2010): I've been married for about 7 years now and I've had great climaxes during sex; however, not every sexual experience is like that. There have been times when it just feels really good - like my husband has hit a sweet spot but I don't climax. I still really enjoy myself and so maybe your new girl is the same way. Good for you though in wanting to give her the most pleasure possible - that's very considerate.
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (18 January 2010):
 Yes people do orgasm differently, but no matter what it should feel like a "release" of tension or something. It sounds to me like she's saying in a nice way, no I didn't have an orgasm. Many women have trouble orgasming and sex can feel great though. Why not just ask her if she's ever had one? If not, try experimenting with different things, like oral and adding in toys. Definitely encourage her to start masturbating as that's pretty much the only way to have your first once you're out of puberty.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2010): maybe your girl's telling the truth but i know i used to give this response to a guy who had a hard time making me orgasm to make him feel not as bad that it didn't happen... i would just keep asking her what she likes what feels best to her, etc.
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