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female
age
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anonymous
writes: Is there such a thing as''real love"'? How many times in your life it happens? People say ''the love of my life''.But what if something goes wrong, and you thought it was ,but it stopped, so now you wonder, if you ever been in real love or it is still on the way. I live in a long term marriage with my husband and we raised children together. The love was ''real''. We both thought at the time, it was our big chance. But now after 26 years, he doesn't want or cant have sex with me. He looks at me with no desire, and he is just not showing love. What am I suppose to think? Should I think, love is never ''real''? Or ,that nothing last forever? Should I divorce him, as he is totally off from love I think. So I'm scared to live like this, for an other 20 years. What is with real love , does it expire? Or it wasn't the one?My husband always says , we will be together forever.. But I wonder ,-what for?What do you think?
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2009):
My friend was married for 30 years. Her and her husband were in a similar situation.They had raised their children and both were away at college.He did not desire her anymore and thought that she did not even like him anymore.He admitted to having an emotional affair with another woman. My friend was devastated at first and they tried to make it work.After a few months she realized that she really was not "in love " with him anymore and that she was just attached to him since they had been together so long. They discussed how they were feeling and agreed to a peaceful divorce. She found a wonderful man a year later and is very happy and he married his mistress and is also very happy.They were "in love" and spent a good part of their life together but they both have fell in love again with other people and I am sure they will spend the remainder of their lives happy with their new loved ones.
It is sad that a marriage of so many years ended but they were not wasted years and they were in love with each other at one time. I think that it was great that they could discuss their feelings and agree to be happy apart. True love can exist more than once.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2009): there is such as thing as real love. people fall in and out of love all the time. maybe its your fault maybe your husband maybe both but if you feel something for him and really still want to be with him explain that to him tell him you still want him the way you wanted him 26 years ago and if he doesnt then tell him somethings got to give. its choice to fall out of love and whose to blame i dont know but i do know you can change this explain to your husband the way you feel and tell him to do the same about his feelings and if you feel the best thing to do is split then do so, but first talk about it because it never hurts to get your feelings out in the open.
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female
reader, Lucyx  +, writes (19 January 2009):
 Hello, Well personally i believe in there is a such thing as 'real' love but i also believe that you can fal in love with somebody just as quick as changing your mind about them. Maybe you should have a chat with him about how you feel and tell him just how strongly you do feel, and tell him your concerns. This may not mean the end of your relainship and after 26 years i should hope it doesnt, hang on in there.
x
Take Care
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