A
male
age
30-35,
*ifeOnAFarm
writes:She wants to go on a break. I don't know what to do. I still love her but I have a feeling shes using me and at the end of the break she won't want me anymore. The break is for one month so do I knuckle down, keep busy and see what happens in a month or do I break up with her so I don't have to hold onto what might be false hope and start getting over her now?She says she still loves me and the break isn't starting for another week but she doesn't seem to want to have sex or kiss or even hug.Any advise?
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male
reader, LifeOnAFarm +, writes (5 April 2010):
LifeOnAFarm is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the advice and answers. The reason it isn't starting for another week is that we aren't back in college until the end of the week and the temptation to contact each other would be too high.
We can't get with other people during the break and we're keeping contact down to once a week tops. I have exams coming up so keeping busy shouldn't be that much of a problem but the lack of physical contact still worries me.
She said that she just wants alone time but that's a bit of a cliched excuse. I think I'll just wait out the month and see what happens even though I still feel like a back up plan.
Anyway, thanks again
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2010): Is this a break that allows you both dating & sleeping with other people? You'd better get a clear agreement on this beforehand.
Don't settle for any open-ended "we'll see what happens" stuff. Either yes or no. If you press hard for a clear "no" agreement and she keeps resisting agreeing to that, then you can probably assume she's already got someone else in mind and ready to go for it.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (4 April 2010):
Something is wrong if she's agreed a time to break up, rather than just do it immediately. I'm not sure why she doesn't just start it now. There seems to be more to this, so let her have the break and see what happens.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (4 April 2010):
 Don't preempt her decisions. You will find that you have more to lose than gain.
You need to respect her decisions and give her the 1 month break.Keep yourself busy.
Whatever her decisions , you need to accept and respect her choice.Accept the reality, cut your losses and move on.
There are plenty of fishes in the sea.
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